Missing Mothers Prevention: "Time's Up"

“Imagine if Stacy Peterson, Jacque Waller, Susan Cox (Powell) Randy Amanda Lehrer, Lisa Stebic, Venus Stewart, Rachel Anderson, Hope Meek, Renee Pagel, Mary Jane Zich, Kelly Currin Morris, Mary Badaracco, Peggy Dianovsky, Kelliesue Ackernecht,Sandra Travis, Rachel Conger,Theresa Parker, or Renee Pernice had the opportunity to complete the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit.....the offenders would be arrested and these cases would be resolved.”.

Time’s Up for Victims of Domestic Abuse

Advocate's Book Review: TIME'S UP by Susan Murphy-Milano

By Diane Santhany of Advocating Ethics

“Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, TIME'S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS. Susan’s writing is based on doing. It is based on the irrefutable credential of experience, both as a residual victim of interpersonal violence and a tireless advocate for others who suffer. This book is born from working in the trenches for twenty years and the necessity of crafting working solutions to help ensure individual safety from batters and stalkers.

TIMES UP is a comprehensive guide for women in danger. Every advocate first responder owes it to those they work to assist to obtain this book.The contents provide specific steps towards safety and addresses issues that a person who is stressed and in fear may not think of. This guide can provide structure in the midst of chaos.

Among the tools and forms is the original idea of an “Abuse Affidavit”, a sworn statement detailing the facts of an individual’s victimization, preserving the specifics so they are not lost even if the victim is. It is difficult to think about speaking from the grave but no different than any life insurance policy obtained in consideration for those left behind.

An “Abuse Affidavit” has the additional psychological benefit of being forced face reality and admit that the potential for the ultimate kind of violence exists…and that if it occurs the perpetrator will be held accountable.

Purchase and read TIMES UP as an advocate to continue to learn and practice informed advocacy. Give TIMES UP to concerned friends or family members looking for solutions for a loved one who is in danger. Most of all, find a way to share this valuable guide with the domestic violence and stalking victims you know and work with. It has all the information and tools to empower a crime victim to save her own life.

Below is the video example of what someone does as they prepare before announcing the relationship is ending:

If you are in a relationship that has a history of violence, simply mustering up the courage to confront the person and say it is over, without the proper tools, can cost you, your life!

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up"fromCourage Network on Vimeo.

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Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence cases and prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team atManagement Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host ofThe Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire

Order now from Amazon.com

ISBN #9781608443604

Also available as Ebook from several sources!
www.susanmurphymilano.com
http://saferelationshipsmagazine.com

--
ImaginePublicity
marketing.promotions.publicity

www.imaginepublicity.com
843.808.0859

The Roth Show with Susan Murphy Milano : R. Barri Flowers, Award Winning criminologist -7:00 Pm Eastern Time

The Roth Show

The Roth Show

Dr. Laurie Roth and Susan Murphy Milano

Wednesday, July 13, 7-8pm ET

Listen LIVE: http://therothshow.com

Author, R. Barri Flowers

R. Barri Flowers is an award winning criminologist, true crime author, and thriller novelist. He is the author of forty books including such bestselling crime nonfiction titles as Prostitution in the Digital Age, College Crime, Male Crime and Deviance, and The Sex Slave Murders; and editor of the upcoming true crime anthology, Murder, Macabre, and Menace: True Stories From Masters of True Crime. Thriller fiction titles include Murder in Maui, Dark Streets of Whitechapel, State’s Evidence, and Dead in the Rose City. Mr. Flowers lives in Oregon with his wife.R. Barri Flowers is an award winning, bestselling author of mystery, thriller, suspense, and romance novels, along with true crime and criminology books, and short fiction. His novels include a brand new eBook private eye mystery, DEAD IN THE ROSE CITY. There is also a print edition available of this title.

Thrillers by the author include, STATE’S EVIDENCE, JUSTICE SERVED, and PERSUASIVE EVIDENCE. Flowers is the editor of the American Crime Writers League mystery anthology, MURDER PAST, MURDER PRESENT and has a noir tale, “The Wrong End of a Gun,” in SEATTLE NOIR.

As a nonfiction crime writer, the author’s latest book titles include PROSTITUTION IN THE DIGITAL AGE, STREET KIDS, COLLEGE CRIME, and FEMALE CRIME, CRIMINALS AND CELLMATES.

Under the pseudonym, Devon Vaughn Archer, the author has also penned several bestselling mainstream and romance novels, including THE SECRETS OF PARADISE BAY, CHRISTMAS DIAMONDS, KISSING THE MAN NEXT DOOR, DESTINED TO MEET, CHRISTMAS HEAT, and LOVE ONCE AGAIN.

Visit R. Barri’s websites at:

http://www.rbarriflowers.com

http://www.devonvaughnarcher.com

www.imaginepublicity.com

Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visithttp://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/

Susan is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talkhttp://www.herewomentalk.com/and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr Laurie Roth. Susan is a survivor- the daughter of a police officer family intimate partner homicide by her father who murdered her mother before committing suicide.

Caylee Marie Anthony : Shining the Light for Justice

From the moment Caylee Marie Anthony's remains were discovered, her young voice silenced, the world stood up and took notice. This child would be recognized internationally in her tragic death and yet seemingly invisible during her short time while alive on earth. Caylee's bright eyes and smile captured our hearts.

As a homicide survivor, moving forward to direct others to safety, shinning a light on their path as it relates to victims of intimate partner violence and homicide was the best way to honor the murder of my own mother, Roberta Murphy, age 47, by my father a Chicago violent crimes detective in 1989. I learned everything I could about crimes within families, from spending long hours in courtrooms to directly helping loved ones at crime scenes and assisting them at surviving every moment of each new day.

Out of my work produced my first book, published by Doubleday books titled "Defending Our Lives: Getting away from Domestic Violence & Staying Safe" in 1996. From there "Moving Out Moving On," Time's Up: How to Survive Abuse & Stalking Relationships" and now the upcoming book scheduled to be released this fall "Holding My Hand Through Hell." Because of my mothers murder, thousands of women and children are less likely to end up from someone else's rage listed on a cemetery headstone.

The same applies to true Crime Author Diane Fanning, whom on November 3, 2009, released the only book on this precious child's life titled "Mommy's Little Girl."

She is an advocate for change. Her voice is often used for those who have been silenced or wrongly convicted. I am sure many of you do not know that earlier this year, Diane Fanning won "The Defenders of The Innocent Award" from The Innocence Project for her true crime book "Through The Window."

Through The Window is more than an investigation into a crime spree that stunned a nation. It's an utterly terrifying plunge into the unfathomable dark mind of a serial killer, and the heart-wrenching story of the brave child who finally brought him to justice.

Fanning's book in April of 2003, was responsible for Julie Rae receiving a new trial. Her conviction over turned because Fanning's book proved Julie Rea did not commit the crime.

http://investigation.discovery.com/tv/on-the-case-paula-zahn/episodes/episodes-2.html That is one hell of an amazing achievement for anyone. With the same investigative tools and insight, Diane Fanning authors "Mommy's Little Girl." This is not just a book, but a voice for Caylee Marie Anthony. Written and released during a time while the world remained outraged and numb. The answers to her life and death are now forever preserved, not only in a book, but in a permanent record for future generations in the Library of Congress.

If we take tragedy and use it to change lives, each of us can hold the lantern of light and hope for others. Diane Fanning should be a shinning example to us all.

I am now asking the question: what are you doing for those lives hanging by a thread to make a difference?

To listen to Thursday's show with Diane Fanning and Sgt. Kim Saucier, go below:

http://murphymilanojournal.blogspot.com/2011/07/house-on-highland-street-crime-scene.html

http://murphymilanojournal.blogspot.com/2011/07/keeper-of-silent-secrets.html

http://timesupblog.blogspot.com/2011/07/in-court-of-public-opinion-verdict-is.html

Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visithttp://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/

Susan is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talkhttp://www.herewomentalk.com/and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr Laurie Roth. Susan is a survivor- the daughter of a police officer family intimate partner homicide by her father who murdered her mother before committing suicide.

The Keeper of Silent Secrets

No matter how many years pass after the murder of my mother, Roberta Murphy, I continue to be the keeper of her silent secrets. As described for the first time in a recent radio interview with Vito Colucci, -http://archives.warpradio.om/btr//Crimetime/060523.mp3

She lived in the silence of the violence just beyond the front door on Highland Avenue in Chicago. A vibrant neighborhood, where one could always find at least one fireman or policeman living on every city block. It was considered a melting pot of middle class families. The wife of a Chicago Violent crimes detective and mother of three hid her pain and fears from anyone who came in close contact with her. And if one looked closely enough, they could see the sadness and fear in her bright brown eyes. Her smile, infectious and disarming. Throwing off anyone who might want to ask if everything was alright. Roberta Murphy always made you feel and believe "she was just fine."

Throughout my childhood, although she had plenty of opportunity, my mother never once spoke a disparaging word about my father (pictured with her above). When he would do the unfathomable and beat her bloody, to the world and her children she held her head high, often making excusing for his violent behavior. As kids we were like confused animals under bright headlights. Unable to comprehend why she stayed. When I would question or ask "why does daddy do this to you"? Her response never made sense and I accepted our lives the way we survived as normal.

That "normal" would play like a national anthem in my own personal life as an adult. Keeping myself carefully guarded from the outside world so I could not be hurt physically by a relationship. I was already prepared for any emotional assault that would come my way, never realizing I accepted it because it was an invisible tattoo deep into the core of who I was.

As the keeper of my mother secrets I would never fully realize their destruction upon my life, until now. Those "secrets" were lifted like a celebration freedom dance in the street. Last week I finished the final chapter of the upcoming book "Holding My Hand Through Hell." The final copy is at the editors and is scheduled for release sometime in the fall.  What the book is about is described in the following :

Summary

This poignant well-written book tells the story of a police officer’s family and a daughter’s quest for justice long after the murder of her mother embracing a legacy of unconditional love and faith to triumph over a life plagued with unspeakable abuse and pain.

Based on a true story written with the flow of a novel, with frank wisdom and wit, “Holding My Hand Through Hell” encourages the reader to immerse themselves into this family's life and become an advocate for change. It will incite discussion, debate, and heightened awareness about hope, survival, abuse, murder, and its impact on our society. In the end, it will leave readers applauding this woman wondering how she escaped, sometimes at the eleventh hour and now 20 years later, realizing that God, after all was holding her hand through hell, delivering her from the evils of her life in order to save others.

http://murphymilanojournal.blogspot.com/2011/07/house-on-highland-street-crime-scene.html

Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visithttp://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/

Susan is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talk http://www.herewomentalk.com/and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr Laurie Roth. Susan is a survivor- the daughter of a police officer family intimate partner homicide by her father who murdered her mother before committing suicide.

Vito Colucci Jr., Exclusive Interview "The Driving Force Behind Susan Murphy Milano"

Susan is always being asked what drives her as it pertains to growing up in the home of a law enforcement family,

moving past being a homicide survivor to her groundbreaking work with victims of intimate partner violence, cold cases, homicide and stalking. Now you will be able to hear, for the first time in an interview with famed former lawman, private investigator and author, Vito Colucci, Jr., Sunday, June 5th at 11:00 PM Eastern Time On his show "Crime Time." The second hour (part 2) will air on Sunday June 12th at 11:00 PM Eastern Time.

To Listen LIVE: http://businesstalkradio.net/weekend_host/ctvc.shtml

Vito Colucci, Jr., owner of Colucci Investigations LLC, is a former member of the Stamford, CT Police Department where he worked as a Narcotic’s Detective and Undercover Organized Crime Investigator. One of the main investigations Vito spearheaded during that time was uncovering the organized crime ties within his own police department.

Vito has been a private investigator for the past 22 years, working many high profile cases; Michael Skakel/Martha Moxley case, Jayson William’s case, and honeymooner, George Smith’s case .

Vito Colucci is a regular commentator on various news programs including: Fox News MSNBC, Catherine Crier/Court TV, Star Jones, Glenn Beck, Nancy Grace, Larry King, CNN Headline News, and The Bill O’Reilly Show, as well as being a featured speaker at the first World Investigator’s Conference in LasVegas in 2005.

Susan Murphy Milano and the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Safe Relationships Magazine instruct on a unique and proven approach preventing more serious crimes that begin with domestic violence and stalking, up to and including homicide. When the criminal justice system recognizes the crime and arrests the offenders, both victims and responding officers and the community are safer. Training/Workshops for all First Responders (Law Enforcement, Advocates, Hospitals, Court Personnel, Attorneys, Agencies)

And Training/Workshops on the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit and video provide legal documentation and answers, allegations and fears when a person goes missing or is murdered. Her strategies are excepted and taught world-wide.

For speaking engagements, training and workshops: Imagine Publicity

PO Box 14946

Surfside Beach, SC 29587

843.808.0859

Email: contact@imaginepublicity.com

And be sure and listen to The Susan Murphy Milano Show "Time's Up" every Thursday at 2:00 PM eastern time live from inside the Zeus radio studio's.

The Book is Available at Amazon or in E-Book format.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talk http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr Laurie Roth. Susan is a survivor- the daughter of a police officer family intimate partner homicide by her father who murdered her mother before committing suicide.

Time's Up and Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit: Go Viral!

There was a successful boycott of Amazon this week because they were selling a book written for the benefit of pedophiles. While I am repulsed by anything that promotes pedophelia or harm to children, I'm not weighing in on that issue, which is out of my realm, but the campaign to boycott Amazon was something that went viral through the internet at breakneck speed, and the mission seems to be accomplished.

While I applaud the efforts, let's think about what could be accomplished if the same people whose outrages against a bookseller would unite, as well, for something equally important....saving lives of the abused.

If you would put those same efforts behind getting the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit used as applied practice in every agency, coalition, court house, police department, hospital, or lawyer's office, think how many lives could be saved.

If each of you that have received my books and completed the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit would pass on the information, just like you did by boycotting Amazon, think of the possibilities!

If you could step away from your computer for an afternoon and take the information to the aforementioned places, YOU can play a huge part in making this go viral, not just online, but in real life. Some of you are alive today because you took the time, did the work prescribed, and completed your Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit.

If you are boycotting Amazon, where my books are sold, you can also purchase them from by website, blog, or the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction.

I look forward to hearing your comments and views.

Susan
murphymilano@gmail.com

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network on Vimeo.

The Susan Murphy Milano Show, Wednesday November 10, 2010 at 4:00 PM EST

www.

Dr. Laurie Roth "The Annie Oakley of the airwaves" joins Susan Murphy Milano today at 4:00 PM Eastern Time Live http://www.herewomentalk.com/ on the Zeus radio network.

Here Women Talk is a fresh social network geared towards what women want: to socialize, to laugh and to learn. Here Women Talk is abundantly growing with women (and men) from all over the world and all walks of life. The unique combination of a social network integrated with its own radio platform has given members new opportunities to connect, offering the chance to do what women love to do, talk! Hosts and topics are as varied as the women of the world, and the audience is reaching around the globe.

Susan Murphy Milano, a veteran talk radio personality, has become the newest host for the Here Women Talk Radio Network. Known as the “Jane Wayne of Justice,” Susan Murphy Milano has always stood up as a voice for those who are silenced in a world of intimidation and violence within their homes and in courtrooms across the country.

Murphy Milano’s new show, “Time’s Up!,” will incorporate her experiences as a Violent Relationship Strategist and seeker of justice as she discusses, with expert guests, topics related to the issues of intimate partner violence in all forms, and offering solutions to those who may be victims enduring abusive relationships.

Murphy Milano says, “The days are over when responders can tell a woman to go back home and keep it within the family as intimate partner murder rates are rising at an alarming pace.”

Sometimes controversial, always passionate, Susan Murphy Milano’s addition to the host roster at Here Women Talk is bound to shake up the airwaves!

Tune in each Wednesday afternoon at 4pm Eastern for an hour of lively, button pushing and provocative conversation!To listen to the show: http://herewomentalk.com

To join the network: http://herewomentalksocial.com
Susan Murphy Milano’s website: http://www.susanmurphymilano.com

ImaginePublicity PO Box 14946 Surfside Beach, SC 29587 843.808.0859 email: contact@imaginepublicity.com
http://www.imaginepublicity.com/

(Susan Murphy Milano, is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction & Public Psychopathy Education for more information visit http://www.saferelationships.com/ and is the author of the new book "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and where ever books are sold. And she is the host of Time's Up on http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and she is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated show with Dr. Laurie Roth on http://www.therothshow.com/)




Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network on Vimeo.

"Jane Wayne of Justice" says Time's Up: Susan Murphy Milano new host on Here Women Talk

Here Women Talk is a fresh social network geared towards what women want: to socialize, to laugh and to learn. Here Women Talk is abundantly growing with women (and men) from all over the world and all walks of life. The unique combination of a social network integrated with its own radio platform has given members new opportunities to connect, offering the chance to do what women love to do, talk! Hosts and topics are as varied as the women of the world, and the audience is reaching around the globe.

Susan Murphy Milano, a veteran talk radio personality, has become the newest host for the Here Women Talk Radio Network. Known as the “Jane Wayne of Justice,” Susan Murphy Milano has always stood up as a voice for those who are silenced in a world of intimidation and violence within their homes and in courtrooms across the country.

Murphy Milano’s new show, “Time’s Up!,” will incorporate her experiences as a Violent Relationship Strategist and seeker of justice as she discusses, with expert guests, topics related to the issues of intimate partner violence in all forms, and offering solutions to those who may be victims enduring abusive relationships.

Murphy Milano says, “The days are over when responders can tell a woman to go back home and keep it within the family as intimate partner murder rates are rising at an alarming pace.”
Sometimes controversial, always passionate, Susan Murphy Milano’s addition to the host roster at Here Women Talk is bound to shake up the airwaves!

Tune in each Wednesday afternoon at 4pm Eastern for an hour of lively, button pushing and provocative conversation!To listen to the show: http://herewomentalk.com
To join the network: http://herewomentalksocial.com

Susan Murphy Milano’s website: http://www.susanmurphymilano.com

ImaginePublicity PO Box 14946 Surfside Beach, SC 29587 843.808.0859 email: contact@imaginepublicity.com

www.imaginepublicity.com

(Susan Murphy Milano, is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction & Public Psychopathy Education for more information visit http://www.saferelationships.com/ and is the author of the new book "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and where ever books are sold. And she is the host of Time's Up on http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and she is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated show with Dr. Laurie Roth on http://www.therothshow.com/)


Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network on Vimeo.

"Silent Mary Jo'"

While there are many intimate partner, stalking and domestic abuse murders to highlight and unsolved cases sitting idle as if they were stacked up in rush hour traffic waiting as investigators inch forward from low gear in the case to finally making an arrest, my attention today is for those who are alive. Living in abusive relationships right now.

I was taken by surprise earlier today when someone whom I consider a close friend and a colleague was seriously injured by her husband. As the day unfolded so did the details of what happened. Every case and situation of abuse bothers me, but this one hit home.

It could be anyone- you, someone you work with, the mom you sat next to at the P.T.A. meeting or even the server at starbucks coffee for that matter.

In an effort to save what I term as the "silent Mary Jo's" of the world those living in war zones across the United States, Canada and Europe, the battle field is their own home I will use a gerneral overview based on the facts a life threatening situation just hours ago.

Mary Jo graduated with a masters degree in business. This highly energetic and attractive young woman landed a job at a chemical company in Washington, D.C. With no shortage of men asking her out she was careful to not get serious with anyone. Her career was a priority. Within a year Mary Jo locked eyes with Peter who had been transfered by the company to the D.C., office. Peter's rugged looks and his charming personality won the heart of Mary Jo. Two years later they married. The following year she gave birth to twin boys. Anxious to continue working Mary Jo started a chemical product company from her garage shipping orders across the country from the family garage until the business required a larger space.

The couple talked and Peter quit his job to oversee the business. Mary Jo maintained majority ownership and control making it one of a handful of female owned minority companies in the country with revenue after 6 years close to $35 million in sales. As the company prospered their marriage began to erode. Important decisions in the company were suddenly usurped by Peter. The hands on management and control she had no longer existed. Mary Jo threw herself into the boys activities and school. And she created a platform for which to speak out against various forms of abuse. That is how we met. At a violence conference in SanDiego where we struck up an immediate friendship. On and off we worked together on various and cases of intimate partner violence. And over the past couple of years we grew closer like girlfriends getting together happend when either us were in the others neck of the woods. But like most victims of abuse Mary Jo was very careful to keep her secret.

When Mary Jo started speaking up and disagreeing with Peter he barked at her as though she were his child. "You don't question me" he would snap back. The conversations -one way of course quickly turned into "ugly" in your face confrontations. When Mary Jo didn't back off enough Peter would slap her across the face with his open hand to physical beatings. Over time Peter was taking control of the household expenses and keeping close tabs on Mary Jo.

Fifteen years later and of few trips to many visits to the doctor, dentist or hospital because of so called "clumsy accidents" Mary Jo had enough. Several months ago she confided in me that she was making plans to end the marriage. In response I told her as a precaution to prepare the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit, "just in case", I said.

Today, I learned that Mary Jo's loving husband Peter has been tracking and stalking her every move. From reading her personal emails on the computer to tracking her movement by the GPS tracking system he activated on the company cell phone he gave her. Peter has been accusing Mary Jo of having an affair. Mary Jo during arguments was now standing up to Peter and this morning she was nearly killed. A neighbor heard her screams and called 911. As the sirens approached the house at 10:20 A.M. EST, Peter bent down and whispered in his bleeding wives ear "think about what cemetary you would like to be buried at my darling."

I haven't been able to speak with Mary Jo. But I can speak to you. Before you decide that you have had enough and are ending the relationship create for yourself the "Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" and video (shown below).

If you do nothing else, please take one important step that if something does happen to you, if you do vanish like Stacy Peterson, Vensus Stewart, Rachel Anderson, Susan Powell, Lisa Stebic, or are found murdered like Monica Beresford-Redmond, Franki Jacobson, Renee Pagel and others where the person responsible has gotten away with murder that your voice and record of the abuse will be captured and recorded. Do it for you friends, family and loved ones. Do it for your children. Do it for you! If you have an opportunity take a moment and download a podcast from a radio show I did earlier on the AWN Radio Network Linked HERE.

How you can escape a violent relationship and get out with your life. ALSO NOW AVAILABLE ON KINDLE
It is better to be a safe and alive "Mary Jo" than "a dead Jane Doe.












Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, "TIME'S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS

"Dead Eyes Tell the Story"

Remember the saying 'the devil made me do it?" It applies well to criminals of intimate partner violence and homicide as the evil side of an abuser releases an invisible stench. We as family, community and co-workers can not see the pure evil associated with an abuser because they are so clever at hiding it from everyone, with the exception of those they prey upon. Innocent women and their children are the abuser's easy targets.

Why? The abuser works behind the scenes where they are unable to be detected by anyone but those in their home, and with whom they are, or were, in an intimate relationship.

Earlier this week Shon Pernice was indicted for the murder of his wife Renee Pernice, 35, last seen on New Years day in 2009, another victim who vanished without a trace, no different than Stacy Peterson, Susan Powell, Lisa Stebic, Venus Stewart and many others who were mothers living in fear and would have never left without taking their children. And, yet, all 5 of the vanishing women's estranged husbands had come down with "abuser brain freeze." When your wife vanishes the brain locks up and the only response to why their wife and mother of the children is suddenly gone is, "I don't know but, we just want her to come home." In each case, if you review media interviews or read their direct quotes, they speak in the "catch me if you can." lingo.

Notice how their abuser body language is the same, how the corners of their mouths slightly turned up trying not to smile, their shoulders are slightly curved as they look into the camera. The eyes tell no lies.  Each man has "dead eyes," dialated and widened a bit more than usual, trying to look concerened for the cameras as they attempt to spin pure hatred to words of compassion.

The terror each woman suffered was literally at the hands of an evil monster, a.k.a their loving husbands.

Turning into the devil, these abusers with predator like characteristics, in my opinion, thought for months as to how they would get away with murder. I remember finding hand written journals my father had written prior to murdering my mother. On several legal pads, in his chicken scratch, was page upon page of dates and times where he was tracking her every move. Then my father layed out his plan of action.

An abuser, in my expert opinion, does not allow their victim to go quietly from their life without some type of pain and suffereing. I'll use my mothers case as an example because I believe it applies to the majority of victims killed by their partners.

My father lured my mother to my childhood home making her believe she had to sign a legal document. Once she entered the home he pulled a gun out, got her in a head lock, dragged her up the four steps to the kitchen and told her how she was going to die. He taunted her with his angry words. I can hear him say"Roberta, your going to die, your a bitch, I gave you everything, Its time to pay for leaving me" . Forget that this veteran law enforcement officer was the king of his domain or that he was loved by everyone who knew him.

My mothers eyes were no doubt filled with the worst human terror a person suffers hours, minutes or seconds before their life is taken. Still in a headlock for what must have seemed like hours, and more likely only several minutes, according to neighbors accounts and a time line of events I had created, without a doubt my mother pleaded for her life. But, in true to form abuser behavior, my father wanted his face to be the last my mother saw when he pulled the trigger. And then he took his own life.

For Venus Stewart, who vanished while walking out to her mailbox on April 26, 2010, I think more than one person may have been involved. Her husband, in my opinion. likely enlisted the help of someone. She was caught by surprise. Once secured for transport and still alive, one person had her legs and feet the other her held the upper body and she was thrown into the car, driven to a different location where the abuser made certain his face was also the last his victim saw before she was killed.

When Renee Pernice vanished mysteriously, as her husband Shon would have the world believe, he, in my opinion, made certain the children were out of the home. In my opinion, his experience as a trained fire fighter came in handy when he, too, likely made ceratin Renee knew she was about to be killed. Pernice was angry. Renee was ending the marriage and he wanted her to pay. In "real time violent partner homicide" the abuser is easily excited, sickly arroused, as they speak to their victim and tell them they are about to die. Abusers get off on the power of final control over this persons life knowing their face, too, is the last she will ever see as they take a final breathe.


The bodies of all five women have yet to be found. In three out of the five cases I do believe they will never be recovered, and pray I am wrong.

Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, "TIME'S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS

National Criminal Profiler Pat Brown :TIME'S UP for Domestic Abuse

Nearly a day does not pass without watching Nancy Grace, MSNBC., Fox News, Jane Velez Mitchell that you do not see and hear Profiler Pat Brown weighing in on a horriffic criminal case. One would not think that with her busy schedule, including her new blogtalk radio show "Profile This," that she has the time to review anything other than what new case she has to profile next. The "master decorder of truth," as I refer to her Pat Brown, took time from her schedule to review my latest book. Reprinting her words below is my way of acknowledging and thanking her when I know her own amazing book is set for release in just 2 weeks titled, The Profiler: My Life Hunting Serial Killers and Psychopaths.

We hear the term, "Domestic Abuse," thrown around quite a bit and it is worth taking a look at what it really means in our own lives. Is it physical, mental, or both? When does one spouse's treatment of the other cross the line from just imperfect humans struggling in a relationship to one partner mistreating the other? After all, we know that marriage can be "work" and issues have to be dealt with and ironed out. We are going to disagree, even argue and be mad at each other, and, sometimes, we are not going to actually be able to kiss and make-up before bedtime. When should one start to worry that there is something really wrong with our marriage partnership?

I would say it is when the "partnership" becomes a boss and employee relationship and the boss is someone we would like to fire. While everyone wants power and control in life, a spouse must be willing to share that power and control with their partner, work together to achieve a balance where both parties are satisfied with the equation. Doing so is not a problem for those who love their spouse and want to see their spouse happy and want to achieve a positive and pleasing family life. Working together is an expectation for a committed couple and being good role models for the children is a natural desire for caring parents.

When one spouse becomes the master, putting his or her needs and desires above the spouse's, doesn't care how his/her mate feels, ignores the impact of this imbalance on the children, this is abuse - whether it is in the form of emotional manipulation of physical domination.

But, let's suppose you have already blown it and you are stuck in a nightmare; you are being mentally or physically tortured with regularity and you fear your mate instead of feeling safe in their company. It's time to make the decision to leave. Susan Milano-Murphy, one of my fellow bloggers at Women in Crime Ink knows well when someone should make a break for it and titles her new book on escaping abuse, TIME'S UP: A Guide on How to Leave an Abusive and Stalking Relationship.

To read the rest of the article go click HERE.

In case you missed the example of the "Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" that should be created before anyone announces they are ending their relationship.

Custody Battles: Before During and After Divorce on The Susan Murphy Milano Show: Wednesday, April 28, 2010 at 4:00 PM EST

Todays guests will be Barry Goldstein is a former attorney and author of the book, “Scared to Leave Afraid to Stay,” and newly released book, "Domestic Violence, Abuse and Child Custody" as well as an advocate for women abused by their partners and sometimes the court system.

And a mother fighting for custody Sharon Executive Director & Radio Show Host and member of the Autism Women's Network will discuss her long and drawn out custody battle fighting for custody of her children.

The number to call into the show with questions or comments is :

1-347-326-9337

Wednesday, April 28, 2010
TIME: 4: 00 PM Eastern Time
3:00 PM Central Time
Show Link: www.blogtalkradio.com/susanmurphymilano

If you miss the show be sure to return to this site where it will re-play automatically through May 5, 2010 or you can down load the podcast by going to the link for the show.

To be considered as a guest on a future show or if you have a subject matter or idea you would like on a topic of interest please email us at murphymilano@gmail.com

Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, "TIME'S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS