Stacy Peterson: Searching Till She is Found

Stacy Ann Peterson vanished on October 28, 2007, from the house in the Illinois suburb of Bolingbrook that she shared with her police-officer husband Drew Peterson, her two children and his two sons, whom she'd adopted.

Within 48 hours, camera crews and journalists besieged the once quiet suburban cul-de-sac. Peterson, then a police sergeant, gave them a show -- a bizarre public display including personal attacks on his wife and her family in the wake of her disappearance. The national media covered Peterson's act like a low-life reality TV show. Each day as Peterson left his house, journalists shoved microphones in his face, hungry for a sound bite for evening crime or news broadcasts. If you were a resident of Illinois during the first three weeks after Stacy vanished, you saw Peterson served up on local, cable and radio programs like a charred chicken flapping its wings almost around the clock.

After several months of being stalked and living under her husband's tight, controlling reins, Stacy Peterson told her husband the marriage was over. In October 2007, Stacy met and consulted with divorce attorney Harry Smith -- ironically, the same lawyerKathleen Savio hired to represent her when she decided to divorce Peterson.

When Stacy failed to show up at her brother's house that late-October day, family members were concerned, especially her sister Cassandra Cales. Just two days earlier, after a cozy family night of movie and pizza, Stacy warned Cassandra that she planned to leave Peterson and said: "If something happens to me, I just want you to know it was Drew." When Cassandra couldn't reach her missing sister, she went to Stacy's house and found the four children home alone, with no sign of Peterson's car. At theBolingbrook Police Department, Cassandra filed a missing-person report.

To me, it seemed Peterson treated Stacy's life as something inconsequential. In his attempts to discredit her during media interviews and up until he was arrested on murder charges for Kathleen Savio, Peterson made comments such as "You know she came from a broken home," or, "Her mother went missing too, so this is not a surprise." Then I heard Peterson say, "Stacy is where she wants to be." My heart sank as I thought of the boys who'd now lost a mother twice.

Seventeen days after Cassandra reported Stacy's disappearance, the Will County State Attorney's Office obtained a court order and exhumed the body of Kathleen Savio. Savio, Peterson's previous wife, was discovered dead in a bathtub in the marital house in 2004. Suddenly, the media and police focus swung from Stacy's disappearance to a new autopsy into the cause of Kathleen's death. The effort to find Stacy lost its momentum. The ground began to freeze, making the search more difficult for family and teams of volunteers. And the media remained hooked on Drew's public displays and his love life, leaving no time to find answers or enlist the public's help in finding Stacy.

In the months that followed, I met with people who knew Stacy personally. From the moment she married Drew, Stacy worked to knit a loving family environment, integrating Drew's then-estranged family into the couple's new life. From all accounts, she had a kind, warm and giving heart. People's eyes sparkled when they spoke of her. She made friends and family feel welcome. When a guest didn't show up for a gathering, Stacy called urged, "Come on," one relative recalled. "We're holding dinner, where are you? We're not starting until you get here."

Another told me: "Stacy was the glue, and that's why her disappearance is so painful to those of us who knew her."

Stacy Peterson's dream was to be a loving wife and mother, an all-around nurturer. She enrolled in nursing classes at a local college. When Stacy could no longer live under Peterson's heavy-handed control and constant watch, she made plans to leave. But like many women in her position, she made a mistake. She told her husband what she planned before she was able to move to a place where she'd be safe from him.

Stacy was silenced in the prime of her life. But there can be no silencing of family and friends who will continue to search for her until she is found. 

 Find out how you can help or offer assistance by going to http://www.ncmissingpersons.org

If you have any information on this case please contact CUE Center For Missing Persons using the contact form below or contact Cue Center at (910) 343-1131 24 hour tip-line (910) 232-1687.

All information submitted to CUE Center For Missing Persons is confidential.

Document The Abuse contains vital information on how the EAA can support each case of abuse from the perspective of the first responders and advocates, to an appearance in court.  It explains the legal benefits to the abuse victim, whether they are able to testify or not, how their words are forever documented and hold up in court, much like a Living Will.

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

 A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writes providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime.

The State of Florida and Officer Involved Intimate Partner Murder

In September of 2010, a Parker, Florida police officer, murdered his former girlfriend, Anna Beach. The sworn to serve and protect law enforcement officer shot Anna, strangled her, then dragged her out in the woods, stripped her clothes leaving her lifeless body in a wooded area.

What is disturbing about the murder, it could have been prevented. The Parker, Florida police department knew Officer Mark Bomia was violent and stalking Anna. She went to them for help, and lost her life all for the brotherhood of the badge.

Last week he was found guilty of first degree murder and will spend his life behind bars.

The family of Anna Beach also filed suit against the city settling for the maximum amount of $200,000 awarded under Florida's Sovereign Immunity law. The agreement with the city to settle was reached the same week the former officer was found guilty of murder.

What also needed to happen in the settlement agreement was enhanced training for officer involved domestic violence. The State of Florida is in violation of the Lautenberg Act in not filing charges against the officer while the victim was alive and sought assistance from law enforecment.

When an oath to serve and protect removes the right of an individual in a relationship with a sworn law enforcement officer from receiving protection, consequences and a zero tolerance policy must be enforced.

The State of Florida has some of the best training facilities and pilot programs for law enforcement in the country. The exception is officer involved training and procedures.

And to make my point, again on Sunday Novemer 14, 2011 a Florida officer fired 10 rounds at his former officer girlfriend who had her police vest on at the time- http://www.wtsp.com/news/article/220434/19/Florida-cop-Kristopher-Bieger-accused-of-shooting-at-ex-girlfriend-who-is-also-a-police-officer

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writes providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime.

Radio Shows: Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.


Books: Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives

www.imaginepublicity.com

To schedule Susan Murphy Milano for your next event, seminar, or workshop, please contact ImaginePublicity: Phone: 843.808.0859 Email: contact@imaginepublicity.com

Level The Playing Field in Officer Involved Intimate Partner Crimes Before A Homicide

Barbara Vanaman was a wife of a veteran police officer in Millville, NJ. She lost her life while
in the midst of ending an abusive marriage. Her police Sergeant husband came from a long line
of law enforcement officers. He claimed self-defense, after he opened fire on her shooting her,
twice.

Afterwards, he cut himself with a large kitchen knife, claiming self-defense, and buying the Sergeant a pity
party from fellow officers and the community, and a crime scene that was never properly
documented or processed.

The Sergeant took a plea deal just before trial . On Wednesday, a judge may reduce the already
outrageous sentence initially imposed of nine years for her murder.

What can we learn from this tragedy?

There are other officer’s wives, as I write this, in New Jersey, living in fear. Uncertain of their future because of their violent and dangerous husbands who happen to be sworn commissioned law enforcement officers. What do we say to them? How do we offer a solution when their lives are hanging by a thread?

A human life was lost. Procedures in this case were passed over because the offender had a good reputation in the community. This case, from the start, was about blue defending blue.

But, what about red defending the red?

The life of Barbara Vanaman is now permanently marked by a headstone. There has to be a more level playing field of survival for victims of officer involved intimate partner violence leading to homicide.

Changing the landscape and leveling the playing field is something I have worked to achieve since my own mother’s officer involved murder in 1989. This case is but one example of how intimate partner homicides are handled across the country. When the wife of a law enforcement officer attempts to seek assistance she isn't supported, instead, she is spoken to by a commander or internal affairs. She is told that if charges are brought against the officer,  he will surely lose his job. From the start, the officer’s wife is "handled" as though it is her fault.

No victim services.

No opportunity to leave the relationship.

No automatic relief for the trauma suffered.

No real hope except to be made to look like an idiot.

An officer is trained, a wife or girlfriend is no match for the explosive waiting to detonate.

The best example is my own, as a daughter of a violent and dangerous law enforcement officer.The lessons learned have saved thousands of lives, but the price continues to be high when I am unable to reach everyone prior to a tragedy.

Part of the solution begins with the Police Academy. There, you have an opportunity to change attitudes. Consequences for actions need to be a mandate among cadets, not lip service. Bring in the wives and girlfriends and teach them techniques that will aid in disarming a potentially life threatening situation. Give them information and materials to use should something happen, where they can go that is safe. In this information provide the prescription available in the "Time's Up book.

I am asking for a change at leveling a field for the wives of officers whose pleas for assistance have fallen on deaf ears. Respectfully, in the line of duty, an officer's funeral is held in the highest regard. For the funeral of a police officers wife, in my opinion, often killed with their husband's service revolver, her life holds the same honor.

Barbara Vanaman was killed in the line of duty as a wife, mother and victim, all because she wanted to move on, minus the violence.

The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit included in the book "Time's Up"

An “Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" and video has the additional psychological benefit of being forced to face reality and admit that the potential for the ultimate kind of violence exists…and that if it occurs the perpetrator will be held accountable.

The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit: A Victim’s Voice (c)(TM)(R)

Domestic violence or intimate partner victims now are able to provide information, in their own words, about the fears, dangers, experiences they have had at the hands of their abuser. The" Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" or "EAA" records victim's stories, histories, and experiences which are preserved and stored on their behalf. These videos will provide answers to the many questions, allegations, and fears that arise when a person has disappeared, gone missing, or been found dead.

In relationships it is important to equip one's self with the proper tools before announcing "it is over." That, is what cost Bea Dickey her life. Unfortunately, hers life mirrors thousand of others across the county, victims of intimate partner violence, trying to break away from their abusive relationships with their lives in tact.

If Beatrice Dickey, or any woman found murdered or is reported missing, had done an Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit, ON TAPE, from following the information in the “Time’s Up" book ,they would be able to describe:

- threats made against her life or wellbeing, including details of how the perpetrator would carry out the threat
- incidents of past abuse that the victim has endured
- admissions or comments made to her about other victims or people abused
- where evidence or weapons would or could be located
- possible alibis that the perpetrator would make up in his defense (including identification of people who could be co-defendant’s or co-suspects)
- portray visible injuries or marks

Just think if we incorporate the only effective plan in the country and have it available for every prosecutor, law enforcement, church, family law office and social service agency across the country, lives would be saved.

Through our corporate and security technology partners we bring the proprietary training to you and your company. And you can now be trained and certified to provide the "EAA" for your clients or within your law enforcement and legal communities or private company. If you are in law enforcement, private investigations, a lawyer practicing in family related matters including custody, a social worker, medical care provider, human resource or are with an employee assistance program or a direct insurer such as Blue Cross and Blue Shield, Zurich N.A., AIG, Anthem, Liberty Mutual, State Farm, AllState or Travelers.

Below is the video example of what someone does as they prepare:

If you are in a relationship that has a history of violence, simply mustering up the courage to confront the person and say it is over, without the proper tools, can cost you, your life!

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up"fromCourage Network on Vimeo.

****

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence cases and prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team atManagement Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host ofThe Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.

If you would like to schedule Susan Murphy Milano for interviews, please contact: ImaginePublicity PO BOX 14946 Surfside Beach, SC 29587 Phone: 843.808.0859 email- contact@imaginepublicity.com

Twenty Nine and Counting:Weekend Casualties Intimate Partner Homicides

The site is called www.domesticviolencecrimewarch.com and since Friday, reported deaths in the war on intimate partner homicide was 29 fatalities.

Were some of these murders preventable? The answer is yes!

The victims while still alive believe the verbally or physically abusive person won't really kill them. It is not a victims reality of thinking clearly because their environment has been toxic for a long time. They believe they know the abuser best and feel they have the situation "under control."

Just the other day a respected physician in family practice, now divorced who is going through a heated custody battle requested assistance to have the threats and stalking stopped but felt "they could handle everything else themselves. How untrue those words are for so many victims who end up dead.

Bottom line is with today's technology and careful planning by offenders that goes into murdering victims of intimate partner violence and stalking, you need an effective plan that deals with all aspects of the violence.

When you go to the doctor because you are sick, they usually write the patient a prescription to get better. The same applies to victims of intimate partner abuse, stalking and potential homicide. The prescription, now available on the market is called , Time's Up!

If you are in a relationship that has a history of violence, simply mustering up the courage to confront the person and say it is over, without the proper tools, can cost you, your life!



The book "Time's Up A Guide on How To Survive and Abusive and Stalking Relationship" is the prescription that every person must obtain before they announce they are leaving. Below is an example from Chapter 4, one of many unique tools provided in the book. It is available onAmazon.com, or you can purchase via e-book or on a CD. If you have questions, the email address is: timesupforjustice@gmail.com

Boyfriend Blamed For Ohio Massacre

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Copley Township, OH: A man gunned down two people outside an Ohio home and two more in a car Sunday morning, then shot his girlfriend in a rampage that left eight dead including the gunman, who was shot by police, authorities and witnesses said. Two others were wounded, police said. A child was among those shot, witnesses said, though police wouldn't confirm that. » more at Cincinnati.com

Buena Park Deaths Investigated As Husband-Wife Murder-Suicide

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Buena Park, CA: Detectives are investigating what appears to be the murder-suicide of a married couple in their 50s involved in a marital dispute, Buena Park police Cpl. Andy Luong said. At about 10:30 a.m., Luong said, the couple's adult daughter called the police about a suicide. She said her father was in a bedroom at a home in the 5700 block of San Benito Way with a single gunshot wound, Luong said. » more at Orange County Register

Apparent Murder-Suicide In Lake Villa Twp.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Lake Villa Township, IL: Lake County sheriff’s police were investigating an apparent murder-suicide Sunday afternoon in Lake Villa Township. Wayne Hunter, sheriff’s chief of administration, said a 49-year-old woman and a 52-year-old man were both dead from apparent gunshot wounds. » more at Daily Herald

Man Fatally Shoots Three, Then Self In Anne Arundel

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Anne Arundel, MD: Anne Arundel County police say a male fatally shot himself and three others, including two juveniles, in a house in Brooklyn Park this morning. Police, called by the man's mother who said her son sent a troubling email, were outside when the final gunshot was heard.» more at The Baltimore Sun

Sheriff Investigating Apparent Murder/Suicide

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Center Point, AL: Jefferson County Sheriff's deputies are investigating what they say looks like a murder suicide. Deputies found 27-year-old Tekaya Nahshon Clark dead from a gunshot wound this morning. » more at CBS 42

Boyfriend Arrested In Murder

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Kissimmee, FL: Osceola County Detectives wrap up a homicide case from Saturday. They arrested Alexis Velez-Medal Sunday morning and charged him with Murder, Grand Theft Auto and Burglary to a Dwelling. Officers were called out to a mobile home on Quemar Drive in Kissimmee on Saturday afternoon When they arrived they found 39 year old Dymarie Phiths deceased inside the home. » more at My FOX Orlando

Englewood Man Kills Wife, Shoots Self

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Englewood, FL: A 66-year-old Englewood man shot his wife Friday night and then turned the gun on himself. Nancy Olms died Saturday at Bayfront Medical Center in St. Petersburg. Frank Olms is currently listed in critical condition. » more at My FOX Tampa Bay

Wife Kills Husband; Fatally Shoots Herself

Friday, August 5, 2011

Farmington Hills, MI: Authorities are investigating the weekend slaying of a suburban Detroit man and a suicide by his wife in their home. Farmington Hills police tell the Detroit Free Press that 52-year-old Lisa Mazzola shot 53-year-old Robert Mazzola to death before fatally shooting herself. » more at Chicago Tribune

Police: Husband Stabs Wife To Death

Friday, August 5, 2011

Wilson, NC: Police in Wilson are investigating the circumstances around a woman being stabbed to death Friday afternoon. Police say they responded to the 2800 block of Herman Drive in reference to an unconscious person. Once there, they found 43-year-old Cynthia Speight dead. » more at WCTI TV

Woman Shot, Killed In Santa Maria

Friday, August 5, 2011

Santa Maria, CA: A 32-year-old Santa Maria man was being sought late Friday night as the prime suspect in the shooting death of his estranged wife earlier in the evening in Santa Maria. Isaac Raymond Martinez is believed to have fatally shot Maria Dejesus Martinez, 35, during an altercation in the area of McElhany Avenue and Broadway at about 5:20 p.m., according to Santa Maria police. » more at Santa Maria Times

SJ Police: Early Morning Homicide Is Domestic Violence

Friday, August 5, 2011

San Jose, CA: A woman who was stabbed to death at a San Jose apartment early Friday morning was a victim of domestic violence, a police spokesman said. The woman, who has not yet been identified, was killed by a 48-year-old man at their apartment in the 4200 block of Albany Drive, according to police Sgt. Jason Dwyer.» more at FOXReno

Harris County Officials Suspect Murder-Suicide In Bodies Found In Car

Friday, August 5, 2011

Harris County, TX: A Dallas-area man fatally shot his estranged girlfriend before turning the gun on himself Friday in a northeast Harris County field, authorities said. A caller spotted what appeared to be an abandoned car about 1 p.m. behind a subdivision along the 15100 block of Silhouette Ridge at John Ralston, Harris County sheriff's deputies said. » more at Beaumont Enterprise

Coroner: Wife Died Of Strangulation During Fight

Friday, August 5, 2011

Youngstown, OH: Police said a fight between a husband and wife ended up with one of them dead. Youngstown police arrested Daniel Wellington, 55, of Knapp Avenue, on an involuntary manslaughter charge early Friday. » more at WKBN TV

Approaches to this deadly epidemic must be implemented if lives are to be saved. When a system continues to do the same old thing, the outcome will not change. As it relates to intimate partnerviolence, the prescription can begin with a training to prosecutors, law enforcement, mental health professionals, judges, hospitals and the community. The methods being taught in conjunction with the information located in the book "Time's Up" is not only saving counties across the country tax payer dollars, it is saving lives.

Know that if you are in a relationship that has a history of violence, simply mustering up the courage to confront the person and say it is over, without the proper tools, can cost you, your life!

The book "Time's Up A Guide on How To Survive and Abusive and Stalking Relationship" is the prescription, if you will, that every person must obtain before they announce they are leaving. Below is an example from Chapter 4, one of many unique tools provided in the book. It is available onAmazon.com, or you can purchase via e-book or on a cd. If you have questions, the email address is: timesupforjustice@gmail.com

Before you decide that you have had enough and are ending the relationship create for yourself the "Evidentiary AbuseAffidavit" and video (shown below).

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network on Vimeo.

******

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. And is with the team of Management Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.