Erased are Women: Mothers, Sisters and innocent lives, lost!

Today is Mother's Day. Instead of celebrating the love of a mother far too many families with motherless children will be visting gravesites across the county. As they place flowers and photo's on the headstone and grave tears of confusion and anger will roll down their cheeks as they stand trying to claim a memory or happy thought about her while she was alive. As the family holds hands inprayer silently they wonder what could they have done to prevent the tragedy?

The list is long consisting of women murdered in their own homes, stalked, missing in action if you will because their life was lost in the war against abuse, power and control. With pleas's for help from the judical system and their community often falling on deaf ears.

Many women are still out there waiting to be found by their families and bring them home. In honor of their lives it is important to list these amazing women, my mother included. I remember after my mom was murdered and a stranger or someone who barely knew me said " out of this tragedy you will triumph." At the time the wounds and emotions still raw I likely responded by barking back to the individual "what a cold and inappropriate statement, you have no clue what I am going through or feeling, my life is forever altered." I was wrong because I was angry, hurt and devasted by the loss of the one person I loved most with all my heart, my mother. From these women's tragedies we can change the course of survior for those among the living as they live in fear and wait for someone to extend a hand offer support to end the war with their children and lives intact.


So to Cindy Bischof, Crystal Brame, Heather Malloy, Rachel Anderson, Stacy Peterson, Paige Birgfeld, Brandy Schneider, Tara Grinstead, Carli Dennis, Heather Malloy, Monica Beresford-Redmond, Tera Chavez, Mercedes McCalley, Army Lt. Holley Wimunc, Charlotte Grahn, Lacey Gaines, Rosa Lisowski, Suzanne Gratton, Barbara Vanaman, Colleen Dwyer, Theresa Parker,Bethanie Dougherty, Denise Taylor, Maria Djelaj, Rose Cobb, Lisa Stebic, Kathleen Savio, Nancy Cooper, Renee Pagel, Selina Johnson, Lisa Freiberg, Karen Skellas, Sgt Sonia Garcia, Rachel Conger, Roberta Murphy, Jan Roseboro, Wendy Theibeault,Linda Yancey, Adelina Weber, Dawn Brossard, Tiffany O'Shell, Jennifer Vodermann, Mary McGinnas,Jessie Davis, Amy Mullins, Nailah Franklin, Elena Cole, Vensus Stewart,Patty Vaughan, Hope Meek, Hannah Crowe, Krishina Townsend, Ronda Reynolds, Melissa Lightsey, Isol Cotto, Debbie Rediess, Amy Yager, Lori DeKleine, Caran Renee Coward, Irma Rodriguez,Natasha Hall, Sharon Kleinsasser, Marie Bruce, Officer Patricia Williams, Sandra Twist, Tracy Judd, Amber Weigel, Antoinette Ross, Kathryn Maxwell, Brandy Hanna, Nancy Rojo, Officer Caran Coward, Susan Powell, Elizabeth Mangiatini, Gina Parsons, Zoelina Williams, Jessie Roponi, Cristi Lynne Hall, Karen Kahler, Wendy Stevens, Ashley Ann Sullivan, Marcia Eakin Mammone, Brenda Canosa, Cheryl Wynn, Franki Jacobson,Susan McFarland, Sandra Viramontes, Shari Cartmell, Whitney Mendez, Nova Henry, Kellisue Ackernecht, Rose Maynard, Alice Morrin, Suzan Annette Sowders-Fuller, carla Westholfen, Kathryn Maxwell, Kristin Longo, Keitha Turner, Katherine Garner, Kelly Currin Morris, Makasha Colonvega, Vensus Stewart, Assiya Hussan, Robin Lee Miller, Amy Duh, Claira McDermott, Sgt. Melanie Lee, Kathryn Minton Tucker, Yolanda Bindics, Laci Peterson, Jennifer Jacobb, Sheila Deviney, Connie Channey, Summer Inman, Beth Bentley, Melanie Metheny and to the thousands of others whom I did not list here, you are forever in all of our hearts. Happy Mother's Day!


[*The women highlighted in blue were officer related deaths]

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network onVimeo.

The Roth Show is a nationally syndicated talk show hosted by Dr. Laurie Roth, Ph.D., and stands on principles and leading the charge for the legions of Americans who are saying “Enough Already!”

Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visit http://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/ She is also in partnership with Pamela Chapman and iAscend Programs. http://pamelachapmanl.biz

Susan is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talkhttp://www.herewomentalk.com/and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr Laurie Roth. Susan is a survivor- the daughter of a police officer family intimate partner homicide by her father who murdered her mother before committing suicide.

The Vanishing Women:Mothers, Sisters and innocent lives, lost!

Today is Mother's Day. Instead of celebrating the love of a mother far too many families with motherless children will be visting gravesites across the county. As they place flowers and photo's on the headstone and grave tears of confusion and anger will roll down their cheeks as they stand trying to claim a memory or happy thought about her while she was alive. As the family holds hands in prayer silently they wonder what could they have done to prevent the tragedy?

The list is long consisting of women murdered in their own homes, stalked, missing in action if you will because their life was lost in the war against abuse, power and control. With pleas's for help from the judical system and their community often falling on deaf ears.

Many women are still out there waiting to be found by their families and bring them home. In honor of their lives it is important to list these amazing women, my mother included. I remember after my mom was murdered and a stranger or someone who barely knew me said " out of this tragedy you will triumph." At the time the wounds and emotions still raw I likely responded by barking back to the individual "what a cold and inappropriate statement, you have no clue what I am going through or feeling, my life is forever altered." I was wrong because I was angry, hurt and devasted by the loss of the one person I loved most with all my heart, my mother. From these women's tragedies we can change the course of survior for those among the living as they live in fear and wait for someone to extend a hand offer support to end the war with their children and lives intact.


So to Cindy Bischof, Crystal Brame, Heather Malloy, Rachel Anderson, Stacy Peterson, Paige Birgfeld, Brandy Schneider, Tara Grinstead, Carli Dennis, Heather Malloy, Monica Beresford-Redmond, Tera Chavez, Mercedes McCalley, Army Lt. Holley Wimunc, Charlotte Grahn, Lacey Gaines, Rosa Lisowski, Suzanne Gratton, Barbara Vanaman, Colleen Dwyer, Theresa Parker,Bethanie Dougherty, Denise Taylor, Maria Djelaj, Rose Cobb, Lisa Stebic, Kathleen Savio, Nancy Cooper, Renee Pagel, Selina Johnson, Lisa Freiberg, Karen Skellas, Sgt Sonia Garcia, Rachel Conger, Roberta Murphy, Jan Roseboro, Wendy Theibeault, Linda Yancey, Adelina Weber, Dawn Brossard, Tiffany O'Shell, Jennifer Vodermann, Mary McGinnas, Jessie Davis, Amy Mullins, Nailah Franklin, Elena Cole, Hannah Crowe, Ronda Reynolds, Melissa Lightsey, Isol Cotto, Debbie Rediess, Amy Yager, Lori DeKleine, Caran Renee Coward, Irma Rodriguez,Natasha Hall, Sharon Kleinsasser, Marie Bruce, Officer Patricia Williams, Sandra Twist, Tracy Judd, Amber Weigel, Antoinette Ross, Kathryn Maxwell, Officer Caran Coward, Susan Powell, Elizabeth Mangiatini, Gina Parsons, Zoelina Williams, Jessie Roponi, Cristi Lynne Hall, Karen Kahler, Ashley Ann Sullivan, Marcia Eakin Mammone, Brenda Canosa, Cheryl Wynn, Franki Jacobson, Susan McFarland, Sandra Viramontes, Shari Cartmell, Whitney Mendez, Nova Henry, Kellisue Ackernecht, Rose Maynard, Alice Morrin, Suzan Annette Sowders-Fuller, carla Westholfen, Kathryn Maxwell, Kristin Longo, Keitha Turner, Katherine Garner, Kelly Currin Morris, Makasha Colonvega, Vensus Stewart, Assiya Hussan, Robin Lee Miller, Amy Duh, Claira McDermott, Sgt. Melanie Lee, Kathryn Minton Tucker, Yolanda Bindics, Laci Peterson, Jennifer Jacobb, Connie Channey, and to the thousands of others whom I did not list here, you are forever in all of our hearts. Happy Mother's Day!


[*The women highlighted in blue were officer related deaths]

Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, "TIME'S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS

"Bionic Woman"

As our lives sweep past in a blink of an eye we appreciate life and all its' gifts often too late in our lives. Childhood often seems like a torture chamber never old enough to do anything or always being told what to do by adults as we keep our eye on the prize when someday we reach adulthood.

Then once we reach adulthood we make many mistakes that hopefully become lessons into our later years.

On facebook, this morning a woman with whom I have not seen or spoke with in 25 or more years re-connected with me. We knew one another through our husbands both at the time in business. I was delighted to learn that she was still married to the same man while I was on husband number..let's say I am embarrassed and have lost count long ago. Her children grown with a family of their own a tribute to the way Marilyn has lived her life. With purpose, value and tradition she planted the seeds taught by her own family generations before.

I also learned Marilyn battled and survived cancer with her family surrounding her, and a mighty courage she beat it.

Marilyn is a woman silently woven in the foundation of traditions slowly disappearing on the American landscape that make the sunshine brighter each day.

The crime for all of us is when we do not take time with our families. When we allow outside influences to chizzle at the very foundation that can never be captured once it is gone.

In Marilyn's closing remarks to me she said "I am blessed", no Marilyn we are all blessed for your contributions as a woman, mother, grandmother, cancer survivor and teacher.

You are truly a Bionic Woman!

You Know You Are A Mother When........

1. Your feet stick to the kitchen floor.....and you don't care.

2. When the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone's bleeding.

3. You can't find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket.

4. You spend an entire week wearing sweats.

5. Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you.

6. Popsicles become a food staple.

7. Your favorite television show is a cartoon.

8. Peanut butter and jelly is eaten at least in one meal a day.

9. You're willing to kiss your child's boo-boo, regardless of where it is.

10. Your baby's pacifier falls on the floor and you give it back to her, after you suck the dirt off of it because you're too busy to wash it off.

11. Your kids make jokes about burping, pooping, etc. and you think it's funny.

12. You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU!

13. Spit is your number one cleaning agent.

14. You're up each night until 10 PM vacuuming, dusting, wiping, washing, drying, loading, unloading, shopping, cooking, driving, flushing, ironing, sweeping, picking up, changing sheets, changing diapers, bathing, helping with homework, paying bills, budgeting, clipping coupons, folding clothes, putting to bed, dragging out of bed, brushing, chasing, buckling, feeding (them, not you), PLUS swinging, playing baseball, bike riding, pushing trucks, cuddling dolls, roller balding, basketball, football, catch, bubbles, sprinklers, slides, nature walks, coloring, crafts, jumping rope, PLUS raking, trimming, planting, edging, mowing, gardening, painting, and walking the dog. You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, and yet...you still managed to gain 10 pounds.
'
15. In your bathroom there is toothpaste on the light fixtures, water all over the floor, a dog drinking out of the toilet and body hair forming a union to protest unsafe working conditions.

16. You buy cereal with marshmallows in it.

17. The closest you get to gourmet cooking is making rice crispies bars.

Happy Mother's Day!