A Lesson for The World: Susan Cox Powell and Her Children

Susan Cox Powell's murder, along with her children's premeditated killings at the hands of their father, is a front row seat to missing persons cases, inadequate children and family services, criminal investigations, family court and a community who stood in silence.

The Huffington Post is now reporting on, after two innocent children are blown-up, and releasing numerous emails Susan sent to co-works, friends and family.

Nine emails were provided to the newspaper after Susan Powell disappeared in December 2009, but at the request of the provider, the newspaper held back on publishing them until now.

"Every moment I step back and take stock of what I'm dealing with, it feels like a never ending cycle but I'm too afraid of the consequences (sic) losing my kids, him kidnapping, divorce or actions worse on his part, if I take a stand on one of his ultimatums like spending $20 on the counseling co-pay or cutting off access to my pay check," she wrote.

When Susan Cox Powell vanished, it was disclosed by the oldest of the boys, "mommy went on a camping trip with us but she didn't come back." West Valley city police, for unknown reasons, decided to sit on evidence; blood, child's disclosure, a letter found in Susan's drawer at work stating "if something happens to me." There was enough within weeks to prevent Josh Powell from leaving the state of Utah and making an arrest. What in God's name were they waiting for?

Why are these emails just now surfacing? If Huffington Post thinks this is a "hot news story," they are mistaken. This is pure ignorance to the seriousness of the crime immediately after Susan was reported missing. They had an opportunity and an obligation to either turn those emails over to law enforcement and or report on them in a timely fashion.

Has anyone from a church in the State of Utah taken any pro-active action pertaining to the importance of what to do if a member of their congregation is in an abusive relationship ? They remain as hushed as the victims whose lives are erased. Why? Because intimate violence remains behind closed doors. Susan Cox Powell lived and breathed a crime scene in her own home each time verbal and physical threats were made to her safety. There are others like Susan, sitting in those church pews on Sundays, are we making an effort to help them? The answer is no!

I'm not here to win friends or influence public opinion. Unless you have lived and breathed your childhood and teen years wondering whether you will live or die, you have no room to be upset with anything done to change how the world does not see these crimes of intimate partner violence and homicide.

Pastor Neil Schori wrote on his blog in February:

Churches MUST become safe for #DV Victims


I’ve spoken with many domestic violence activists and also with victims of abuse. One of the most common things they say is that they have not found churches to be supportive of them. Activists tell me that it is almost as if pastors and church leaders don’t actually even hear what they are saying. Victims have told me that pastors have condescendingly told them that they are involved in active sin by attempting to divorce their violent abusers and that they needed to go home and submit and “suffer for Jesus.”

This should make you angry and sad. AND ready to stand up and say NO MORE! The church should be a refuge for victims of abuse. Abusers should look at the church as a dangerous place for them to pull out their false-piety and sugary sweet manipulation.

Jesus came so that we would have overflowing, beautiful life. That certainly includes victims of domestic violence. Will you help us?

Please ask your pastor to talk about domestic violence at your church. Tell your pastor that 5 families in your church can be a part of rescuing the 1.3 million victims of domestic violence in the US each year. Tell your pastor about this incredible resource: http://documenttheabuse.com

I’d love to add you to our growing list of safe families for victims of domestic violence. Send me a message if you are interested in learning how.

Since the disappearance of Stacy Peterson on October 28, 2007, Pastor Schori is working to get the faith based communities across the counrty on board with the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit located on the Document The Abuse. com site.

Maybe the Huffington Post can write about what is actually working to save lives. Printing these emails now is a crime all by itself!

*****  

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

 A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writes providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime Susan is also the daughter of a Chicago Violent Crimes detective who murdered her mother before committing suicide. 

The Sixth Amendment : New Protocol in Cases of Domestic Violence & Stalking

Until now, the standard response for intimate partner violence and stalking from law enforcement has been:

    * Victims are told to report (but action is only taken if you can show evidence of the abuse)
    * Victims are told to go to a shelter
    * Victims are told to get a restraining order (but usually only granted if there is evidence of the abuse)
    * Victims are told to move away (but leaving behind careers, family, and assets)
    * Victims are told to stay with someone else
    * Victims are told stalking is hard to prove and stalking laws are often weak and poorly defined

This response does not help the victim ‘document’ the situations and specifics of her abuse and her abuser. Outside of a police report or restraining order, documentation has still not occurred. In a case of future serious injury, the victim goes missing, or is killed, nothing exists to link her to her story.

Solution: Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit as Historical Abuse Documentation

The E.A.A. has the propensity to document the historical aspects of the abuse and record it to challenge 'hearsay' arguments in a case. By simply following the steps of creating an E.A.A. a victim can provide 'before the event' information that presents the history of her case prior to serious injury, disappearance or death. Click here to read more about how the E.A.A. benefits a victim's case.
 

Problem: Lack of Documentation of Abuser’s Motives, Habits, Risks, History, Weapons, or Location

Abusers, especially those with high lethality risk factors, are those most likely to seriously injure, re-injure, stalk, ignore stay away warnings, child abduct, or kill. These dangerous abusers are not merely low life criminals but can also often be white collar professionals whom from the surface do not look capable of these life-threatening behaviors. Those abusers without former police reports or arrests are likely to lack the documentation of their impending motives behind future acts of violence. His private personal habits are often unknown as is any mental health or other lethality risk factors such as addictions, undiagnosed mental health problems, housed weapons, impulse control problems, prior stalking behavior, or other acts of perpetrated violence.

Solution: Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit as Abusers Profile Documentation

In cases in which no outside documentation exists (no police reports, no shelter visits, no restraining order, no CPS reports), the only historical information about the abuser is often from those closest to him, including the victim.  Partner related assessments of pathological disordered person’s behaviors and motives have been utilized in other settings to help highlight the undiagnosed pathology (see The P-SCAN, Dr. Robert Hare).

Information such as details of how the perpetrator has said he would carry out harming, abducting or killing her can be detailed.  Admissions or comments made to her about other victims the perpetrator has harmed can be listed. Likely hiding places for weapons or evidence can be revealed. Possible alibis that he would make up for his defense (including identification of people who could be the perp’s co-defendants in her harm, abduction or murder).  If the victim has existing scars or active wounds, they can be documented at the time of the E.A.A. creation.

The E.A.A. has the same informational capabilities of providing unknown and unrecognized abuser and stalking risk factors known by the victim.

Problem: No Way to Identify Her Wishes About Her Children’s Placement In Case Their Parent Is a Perpetrator

In high conflict cases, the perpetrator often does not want, and cannot share, custody of their children. Power and control dynamics coupled with pathology is at the core of why they will do anything to not lose custody—including serious injury, abduction or murder.

In cases where the victim goes missing and there is no Last Will and Testament about her desires for the placement of her children and no legal documentation of her abuse by the perpetrator, custody is almost always given to the other parent should she not be present.

Solution: The E.A.A. as a Suggested Custody Placement Tool

The E.A.A. is utilized as a Last Will and Testament during which the victim indicates she is concerned about serious injury, disappearance, or being killed. Naming the perpetrator as the possible suspect will remove the children from his custody during investigation and/or trial. The victim has the ability in the E.A.A. to name where her children should be placed in case of her injury/death and his arrest. This provides a deep sense of comfort that her wishes are made known regarding children’s placement and that she has made efforts to assure they don’t end up in the perpetrators care.

Problem: Abusers Think They Will Get Away With It Because There Is No Documentation So There Is No Deterrent For Their Behavior

Victims who have no documentation of their abuse (through police reports, CPS reports, restraining orders, stalking reports etc.) often have abusers who think that they have future opportunities to abuse because no one knows abuse is occurring. Believing the victim is not likely to report in the future because she has not reported in the past, abusers feel no deterrent for their behavior. The more times an abuser repeats, the higher the risk factors associated with the victim’s serious harm potential. Some abusers believe that even if she did report and he was not arrested, that in the future he will also not be arrested or his battering exposed.

Solution: The EAA as Future Prevention—As The EAA Becomes a Standardized Protocol in Domestic Violence It Teaches Abusers That All Victims Will Get an E.A.A.

We see a future when the E.A.A. becomes a standardized protocol in intimate partner violence and stalking. Not only will victims be readily utilizing the E.A.A. themselves, but first line responders who interact with victims will have as an automatic process, creating an E.A.A. on every victim. Emergency room physicians, paramedics, domestic violence agencies, attorneys and prosecutors, court house personnel, free clinics…anywhere a victim is likely to go. When the E.A.A. becomes standardized as a model of care approach in intimate partner violence, perpetrators will also know that all victims are being offered the E.A.A.

We see a future when the E.A.A. will actually prevent future acts of violence against victims when abusers know evidence is likely to have been legally documented.

Problem: In Court, Testimony of Prior Abuse is Argued as ‘Hearsay’

A long standing hurdle in the cases of domestic violence and stalking where prior evidence does not exist, is the defense’s argument that family/friends allegations of pre-existing abuse is merely ‘hearsay’ and often dismissed as non-credible evidence. Hearsay is an out of court statement "offered for the truth of the matter asserted" and is not subject to cross-examination, typically because the speaker is unavailable.  Such statements are deemed unreliable because of the obvious fact that they can easily be fabricated and can not be tested through cross examination.

The 6th Amendment rights (for the abuser to be able to confront his witnesses) have been a death blow in the past to witness testimony in DV cases in which the victim is missing or dead.

Solution: E.A.A. as Pre-Existing Before The Fact Evidence

After-the-fact testimony on intimate partner violence and stalking is solved with the E.A.A. because it is recorded prior to the fact of testimony. It is prior evidence of pre-existing abuse before the onset of court action. The victim’s pre-recorded abuse testimony, and documented and notarized affidavits, are arguable under seeking admission of the testimony, not merely for the truth of the statement, but for a highly relevant other purpose. Victims often tell others about the abuse or stalking in case she goes missing or is harmed. The legal argument is focused on the effect the abuse had on the victim that impacted her enough to confess fear of death to someone else. Or when victims say “If anything happens to me, please take care for my children’ which offers dynamic impact and is comparable, in some ways, to a dying declaration. Portions of the affidavits of the E.A.A. are a notarized Last Will and Testament, which is a victim’s dying declaration.

Problem, In Court—The Perpetrators Rights to Confront Their Accusers 

The 6^th amendment gives the accused the right to face their accuser and to argue the points of the accuser’s statement. There isn’t a person in the United States that doesn’t know that is their basic right. But what happens with the accuser is missing, in a coma, or dead? 6^th amendment rights have been another legal hurdle for domestic violence victims who are no longer alive to tell what happened to them.

Courtwatch Brevard is an organization that tracks the effectiveness of judicial decisions in domestic violence cases. Below is an example of a 6^th amendment and domestic violence case.

 http://courtwatchbrevard.org/drupal/?q=node/176

Giles v. California, 554 U.S. 353 (2008)

Facts of the Case

When Dwayne Giles was tried in state court for the murder of his ex- girlfriend, he claimed self-defense. Giles stated that he had heard her vow to hurt him and a friend, and that she had previously shot a man and threatened people with knives. The prosecution then introduced evidence of a conversation between Giles' ex-girlfriend and police in which she claimed that he had assaulted her and threatened to kill her. The district court eventually convicted Giles of murder.

On appeal, Giles argued that use of the police conversation violated his Sixth Amendment right to confront witnesses against him, namely, his deceased ex- girlfriend.

The California Supreme Court held that Giles had waived this right because he was the cause of his ex-girlfriend's absence. Although this exclusion was justified under common law rules of "forfeiture by wrongdoing", the Supreme Court had greatly constrained the admissibility of such evidence in its 2004 holding in Crawford v. Washington. Crawford essentially wiped out the admissibility of such out-of-court statements unless the testimony could be subject to cross-examination at trial, an option that would be impossible under these circumstances. This case gives the Court an opportunity to expand on its decision in Crawford and to apply it to a situation where the wrongdoing that kept the witness from appearing in court was not motivated by a desire to prevent the witness' testimony.

Question
Are a criminal defendant's rights under the Confrontation Clause of the Sixth Amendment violated when the common law "forfeiture by wrongdoing" doctrine is applied to allow out-of-court statements made by a witness, absent due to the defendant's own conduct, into evidence without giving defendant an opportunity to cross-examine the absent witness?

Conclusion
Yes. In a 6-3 decision, the Court held that the forfeiture by wrongdoing exception only applies to situations where the defendant causes the witness' absence with the intention of preventing that witness from testifying at trial. Without this intention, any act by the defendant making the witness unavailable does not waive that defendant's Sixth Amendment right to confront and cross-examine the witness, and therefore any out-of-court statements made by the witness are inadmissible as evidence. Justice Antonin Scalia delivered the opinion of the Court.

Justice Clarence Thomas wrote a concurring opinion stressing his belief that statements such as those made by the witness in this case should not implicate the Confrontation Clause at all because the police questioning was not a "formalized dialogue." Justice Samuel Alito also wrote a concurring opinion suggesting that the witness' statements, in his view, did not fall within the Confrontation Clause but noting that neither party had made this argument before the Court. Justice David Souter, joined by Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, concurred in all parts of the majority opinion except one section denouncing the dissenting argument. Justice Souter stated that he did not find the dissent as wrongheaded as the majority suggested.

The dissent, written by Justice Stephen Breyer and joined by Justices John Paul Stevens and Anthony Kennedy, argued that a defendant loses his right to confrontation when he makes a witness unavailable due to his own wrongdoing, even if he did not act with the specific intention of preventing her from testifying at trial. (Used with permission of Courtwatch Brevard)

Solution: Proving Forfeiture with The E.A.A.

A pre-existing videotaped notarized testimony of a victim’s abuse would secure the forfeiture law in her case. The ability to link her disappearance through her testimony and evidence that she leaves behind, prevents the perpetrator from benefiting from her absence and the ability to testify. 

A Victim’s Case Example Where An E.A.A. Was Needed

Vashti Seacat, murdered by law enforcement officer husband

The couple had been married since 2004. During the marriage Vashti Seacat had given birth to a son in 2007 and another in 2009. Child support was ordered to be paid by a judge in the amount of $1,281 beginning on May 15, 2011.

Vashti Seacat had filed for divorce from her husband Brett Seacat just 16 days before a sudden fire on April 30th which caused heavy damage to the family home. Her husband at the time was employed as a police instructor at the Kansas Law Enforcement Training Center after a number of years with the Sedgwick County Sheriff’s Department. In the divorce papers a judge ordered Seacat out of the marital home within 24 hours of being served the papers however, he remained in the home despite the order to vacate.

The boys and their father would escape the blaze without injury but Vashti Seacat was not so lucky. She would not die as the result of the fire, but according to the medical examiner a gunshot wound to the head. The medical examiner was unable to determine whether the wound was self-inflicted because the entry wound was destroyed in the fire. Brett Seacat then easily made claims his soon to be ex-wife was “suicidal.”
Last week in court, after two long days of testimony, the judge decided there was enough to charge the former law enforcement officer with murder. He is being held on $1 million dollars bond and the next court date is schedule for January 6, 2012.

Tragically, this is an all too common with a case ending in murder. Vashti suffered constant abuse including threats to her life at the hands of her estranged husband. Vashti and her fears are now left to “hearsay” statements repeated by friends and relatives in the aftermath of her murder.

What should have happened but did not, was Vashti Secat could have prepared the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit. She could have done this at the courthouse, therapist's office, or at a remote location to document the abuse. It would then be witnessed by two people and then it would have been notarized before video taping her own words about the abuse in the relationship and her fears of being killed. This would remove "hearsay" and any doubt that she feared for her life.

If you are considering ending a relationship, before you say the words out loud "it's over,” before you go to court and file for a protective order from the courts, and before you see an attorney, prepare the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit.

With the E.A.A. your words will count and will account for your history of abuse. With the E.A.A. no one can try to claim you killed yourself or if you just happen to go missing, the E.A.A. will serve as your voice and the person responsible for your harm will be arrested.Benefits of The E.A.A.

The E.A.A. provides legal and evidentiary support to the issues of:

    *Historical Documentation for the timeline of her abuse
    *Proof of Stalking
    *Affidavits as Abusers Profile Documentation
    *Suggested Custody Placement
    *Possible Prevention of Future Acts of Violence By Perpetrator
    *Legal Defense Arguments of Hearsay



The new site Document the Abuse.Com contains vital information on how the EAA can support each case of abuse from the perspective of the first responders, prosecutors, family attorneys, victims and advocates, to an appearance in court.  


Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.
 A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writesproviding commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime.

Failure to Protect: Intimate Partner Violence

Over the weekend in Michigan, another mother has lost her life to intimate partner homicide. Stephanie Fish, 34 [pictured above] was found shot to death. On Sunday, after an amber alert was issued her 4-year old son was found safe and unharmed.

This morning in Ohio, Ranna Peale, 31, mother of 4 children, found shot several times prior to her ex-boyfriend killing himself was informed when attempting to obtain a court order of protection, "there was nothing she could do until an actual crime was committed."

Today, in Louisiana Natalie Grady, 49 mother of 4 was shot by her husband before turning the gun on himself. The couple had a history of violence in the home. Natalie was a neonatal nurse at Woman's hospital.

In New York, Bridget Bell, 29, was stabbed to death by her former boyfriend as her 3-year old child slept upstairs.

Now for the mothers and their children you will never read about with your morning coffee or watch on CNN. Why? Because they had a plan to leave their toxic and violent relationships. Yes, it took every ounce of strength to leave, but, they carefully planned, packed their bags making a new life for themselves far away from the violence and potential threat to their lives.

So why are we seeing bloodshed at epidemic proportions? How is it possible the majority of female missing person cases involving mothers suddenly vanish such as Susan Powell Utah;Hope Meeks Oklahoma; Lisa Stebic Illinois; Venus Stewart Michigan; Lisa Shuttlesworth South Carolina, Stacy Peterson Illinois; Jacque Waller Missouri and others ending marriages have yet to be found? And in many cases the person responsible yet to be charged? Is it too any cases, too little manpower?

Domestic violence and stalking is a crime. Yet, it is still treated as a 'private family matter' within communities across the country. A person faces automatic arrest, no questions asked when they get behind the wheel and drive drunk. Because it is against the law. Also against the law is domestic violence. It is a crime to threaten bodily harm or beat a person. The offender too cowardly to start a random act of violence in public, gets away with controlling abusive behaviors behind closed doors because there is no real consequences to actions, unless they kill.

Attitudes must change from Corporate America on down to rural small town populations, domestic violence is a crime. It is against the law. In America, at least eight women are murdered everyday. With budget cuts law enforcement can only do so much. Communities must take a more active role in their communities, including the church. The need to stop the bloodshed is overwhelming, but not impossible.

Holidays will also trigger events that will no doubt bring forth more tragedies as estranged parents decide who will have the kids on what day and for how long. The courts both civil and criminal will be a revolving door for court orders of protection, child support, and financial matters fueling emotions of anger and resentment surely adding to the epidemic of intimate partner homicide.

Below is an important solution currently available on Amazon in the book "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships. Staying many steps ahead of an abusive individual can mean the difference between life and death. Don't wait. Time's Up!

By: AMY VITRANO

MYRTLE BEACH, SC --

A study out by the FBI in October said South Carolina ranks number one in the nation for violent crimes. One type of crime that's on the rise in this state is domestic violence.

According to the South Carolina State Attorney General's website, an average of 33 women are killed each year in South Carolina as a result of domestic violence. Most of the time, they occur behind closed doors.

But Susan Murphy-Milano hopes to give victims everywhere a chance to be 10 steps ahead of their abuser. She never wanted to be a domestic violence advocate. She had a great life as an investment banker until it all came crashing down one night in 1989.

"My mom was a long time victim of abuse,” Milano explained. “My father was a Chicago violent crimes detective. He murdered her and then took his own life. I vowed to change the world."

Milano has taken baby steps to do so over the last 20 years, working with women one on one to get out of volatile relationships. She's even written book on the subject.

Milano plans to take her knowledge mainstream with a new phone application for an evidentiary abuse affidavit (EAA).

"We have something called Crawford vs. Washington across the country and all these cases, when a woman goes missing, you don't know what she said,” said Milano. “You don't know about the offender. So in a case like that, had she prepared an affidavit, which is almost like a will: it talks about the incidences, gives her date of birth, her social security number, gives his information... So for the first time you have in the victim's words what's going on. It's not hear-say."

"I don't think in any way what happens inhibits me from having a normal life, a happy life. I try to learn from there mistakes so I make sure I don't get into a situation like my mom did," said Tina Abassi, who lost her mother at 15 to domestic violence.

Farah Abassi was killed by her father, Asghar Abassi Eliderani, at the family's convenient store in Socastee in 2008. It was the end of a childhood that Abassi says seemed normal.

"I don't remember growing up and thinking anything was wrong cause it's all I knew,” said Abassi. So if you grow up thinking that your parents fighting and not sleeping in the same bed, arguing and having your dad hurt your mom is normal, you don't think you're growing up wrong. You just think, 'Oh they're just fighting.’"

"We don't look at domestic violence as anything other than a private matter,” Milano said. “How many private matters are they going to continue to scream in silence?"

Milano created a new app that will allow a victim to record a video and fill out documents. They can explain the abuse and can include photos and information police could use in case if something happens. Milano hopes it will also give prosecutors evidence for conviction.

"So in her words, it shows that when somebody does this, it's premeditated,” she said. “So a lot of these cases individual offenders who go to trial and say, 'I was unhinged. It was a crime of passion.' Pardon me, but bullshit it wasn't. It's not a crime of passion; it's premeditated and they think they can get away with it."

Asghar Abassi Eliaderani was convicted of involuntary manslaughter in 2010, and received five years in prison as a sentence for killing his wife; a sentence that will be up within a year because Eliaderani is in a work release program.

"If she [Farah Abassi] had the EAA, it could have been something discreet that she could have filmed, that she could have said to know that incase anything ever happened, her voice would be heard,” said Abassi. “That would have given her peace of mind because she was so stressed out."

"You've got budget cuts across the country,” said Milano. “So to have this technology means that you're going to reduce the burden of the State for prosecutors or district attorneys in going in and doing this. If she does this, half their job's over with. If she winds up missing, it’s an easy arrest. You've effective a case that you wouldn't have had."

The new phone application is set to débuted on December 25^th, but the information is available to all victims in a book written by Susan Murphy-Milano titled Time’s Up. Click here to Milano’s website, where the book can be purchased.

If you are in a dangerous relationship and would like help getting out, the South Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault can help. Contact them at 1-800-260-9293. You can also contact Milano directly through her email, murphymilano@gmail.com.

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writesproviding commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime.

http://murphymilanojournal.blogspot.com/2011/11/new-tool-provides-victims-of-domestic.html

New Technology for Domestic Violence and Stalking Crimes

Technology is about to change the way victims of domestic violence and stalking will be able to document and video the abuse and potential threats against their lives. It is also a unique way, once the technology is used across the country, for abusers to think twice about making their spouse or girlfriend vanish without a trace. In her absence, if the victim has completed the process, called the "Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit"it will bring an arrest and a solid case for prosecutors.

This comes at time when the city of Topeka, Kansas just repealed the domestic violence law in the city. Their excuse is not having the money to prosecute crimes that can and are leading to murder of victims and their children. I expect other cities to follow cost saving methods, hopefully not as drastic as Topeka, which could include writing a simple ticket rather then making an arrest.

In many of the cases resulting in murder, where the victim and or children are killed, but the former husband or boyfriend remains alive and is awaiting trial, the victims fears and testimony in these cases is important for law enforcement and prosecution. The victims words are admitted into testimony at the trial as "last will and testament" rather then as in current cases "hearsay." Another important aspect is a victims words about the offender. Who they are and how the threats against life and limb were real while the victim was still alive. Removing the offenders right as per the sixth amendment to face the person who is accusing them (because they are no longer alive) this is groundbreaking.

The technology will also be a voice for those silenced during post decree issues. As the world witnessed last week, an angry ex-husband stormed into a busy beauty salon in California killing 8 people, including his ex-wife who claimed while alive he threatened to kill her. Now, his actions and mental health will be in trial, the threats and abuse she suffered will be considered "hearsay" because she did not have the opportunity to prepare the document and video.

THE GOAL OF THE TECHNOLOGY:

To significantly reduce the number of homicides and missing persons per year by

providing cutting edge technology and vital knowledge that will first give potential

victims a fighting chance, a strong voice, provide valuable non‐reputable evidence that

will aid in any investigations, eventual conviction, overruling “hearsay” laws, in the

worst case scenarios and provide a powerful deterrent against would‐be attackers.

 To significantly reduce the costs incurred by law enforcement, the justice system and health

care services, including insurance claims, each costing taxpayers annually.

If my mama could see me now, wow! In her death, my work and this new technology is a reality. Years ago after she was murdered by my police officer father, my goal was to keep others alive, always striving to find an effective solution. I realize the importance of following your dreams, believing you can change the world!

About the Conference

Nationally recognized Intimate Partner Specialist, Susan Murphy Milano, and Chet Hosmer of

WetStone Technologies, a wholly owned subsidiary of Allen Corporation of America are

partnering to bring a newly created technology that will revolutionize the way cases of intimate partner violence are handled at every level. The technology will be unveiled nationally October 31 at the Techno‐Forensic Conference in Myrtle Beach, SC. http://www.techno‐forensics.com/ - If you are interested in covering the event or writing a story please contact

Delilah@imagine publicity.com or for more information call 843.808.0859

http://www.techno-forensics.com/session/intimate-partner-violence-growing-epidemic-how-technology-can-aid-law-enforcement-and-prosec

****

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team at Management Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.

If you would like to schedule Susan Murphy Milano for training and interviews, please contact:ImaginePublicity PO BOX 14946 Surfside Beach, SC 29587 Phone: 843.808.0859 email- contact@imaginepublicity.com

The Elephant in the Room

Society provides wellness and support for those whom are survivors of various types of illnesses but what about crime survivors? Mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, children and communities are impacted by violent crimes such as rape, robbery, felony assault, hate crimes, domestic violence and child abuse. Surviving victims of crimes require healing that goes deeper than simply bringing the person responsible to justice. Crime survivors often find themselves grappling with difficult questions: How am I move forward with my life? What will happen next? Will I ever feel safe again? Where can I get information? What are my rights? Who will simply listen to me and respect my feelings and decisions? Why is surviving a violent crime always the silent "elephant" in a room?

HOW TO SUPPORT A SURVIVOR OF CRIME

Ask them to talk about what happened to them. Listen and support what they are sharing with you. Do not offer opinions, judgments or advice about what you hear and read about in other cases or the news. Encourage the person to describe what they: Saw . . Heard . . . Thought . . . Smelled . . . Felt . . .

It is important to tell them they are valued and your caring for them has not changed. Tell them how much you appreciate them as a person and in your life.

Simply listen: Listen to his or her emotions as well as the story.

Understand that people communicate in other ways than with their words. Try to understand and take cues from your loved one's expressions and body language. Maybe they are nervous and fighting with their hands embarrassed by the crime. or afraid you will judge them merely because they are disclosing something they feel is embarassing. Take your hands and hold theirs as they speak to you.

Encourage them to set priorities and problem-solve with input from family and close friends.
Allow time to heal. Don’t tell them to "get over it." Remember that every day they may be re-experiencing the event through dreams, memories, emotions or injuries that take time to heal.

No one expects a broken bone to heal over night, but often people expect loved ones to "get over" trauma after a day or two.

Think of healing as a group issue, not an individual one. As a caring person, you are impacted too. Take time for yourself, be gentle with yourself and with others.

Facilitate support from your church, family members and friends.

Laughter as Ward Foley author of "Thank My Lucky Scars" and Why God Did Not Make Me a Woman Because I have Enough Problems" will tell you humor is the best medicine. Use humor (preferably not about the event.) Try to lighten up if you can. And whatever you do if you cannot say something nice then zipper up your lip and keep it to yourself.


Give hugs daily.


After some time has passed, review what has happened. Concentrate on how each person has changed or grown.

Crime Survivors often lack an appetite. And they will not eat, especially if they are isolated or left alone for long periods of time. Make their favorite meal and eat with them.
Surviving a violent crime takes courage and inner strength.

Plan outside activities, even if it is a walk around the block. Fresh air and excercise are very important.

Look on the Internet and research support groups of crime or assualt. Talk to the person about joining a group or ongoing discussion.

Plants and flowers in a home of a crime victim survivor are also very important. Perhaps create a project and plant blubs and flowers in their yard. Create a garden of items that they might enjoy that you could create on a window sill. It does not always have to be in a yard. Consider asking the church for volunteers to help with things from their garden that a person might enjoy.

Surviving crime victims deal with the aftermath three hundred and sixty-five days a year, seven days a week. Providing friendship and hope for just one day is a day less of painful thought and memory in the mind of a crime victim survivor.