Psychopaths present themselves initially as intensely interested in a woman. And according to Sandra Brown, M.A., author of "Women Who Love Psychopaths," they have connected the dots to design the best approach to get her.
Kathleen Savio: In 1992, Kathleen Savio accountant in her late twenties when a mutual acquaintance who happened to be a police officer’s wife set up a blind date for her to meet Drew Peterson. What Kathleen did not know at the time was Drew was still married to his second wife Vicki Connelly. But, Drew charmed her telling Kathleen he was divorcing Vicki because she was a herion addict. And what would Drew have to gain by lying? A clever psychopath always pre-sets the stage for their prey. In addition, he sealed his love bond with Kathleen knowing damn well she would never make contact with Vicki, much less allow the woman anywhere near her.
Kathleen Savio: In 1992, Kathleen Savio accountant in her late twenties when a mutual acquaintance who happened to be a police officer’s wife set up a blind date for her to meet Drew Peterson. What Kathleen did not know at the time was Drew was still married to his second wife Vicki Connelly. But, Drew charmed her telling Kathleen he was divorcing Vicki because she was a herion addict. And what would Drew have to gain by lying? A clever psychopath always pre-sets the stage for their prey. In addition, he sealed his love bond with Kathleen knowing damn well she would never make contact with Vicki, much less allow the woman anywhere near her.
Drew Peterson was indeed, the master of his own stage. Kathleen likely thought to herself his explaination about Vicki sounded logical. The relationship built quickly, sharing feelings, talking, and eye-gazing. All the phases Peterson created to form his false "love bond."
Within a few short months Peterson quickly moved through the stages of psychopath attraction (as detailed in the book) and bonding like "road runner on crack" asking Kathleen to marry him. With excitement in her voice she called members of her family to share the news of the couple’s engagement and impending marriage. Kathleen felt good about her decision knowing she was marrying a man who made her feel safe and secure. And in a blink of an eye, they were married.
Within a few short months Peterson quickly moved through the stages of psychopath attraction (as detailed in the book) and bonding like "road runner on crack" asking Kathleen to marry him. With excitement in her voice she called members of her family to share the news of the couple’s engagement and impending marriage. Kathleen felt good about her decision knowing she was marrying a man who made her feel safe and secure. And in a blink of an eye, they were married.
The majority of those whom fall prey to men such as Drew Peterson have invested themselves totally in the relationship similar to an invisable toxic drug. Kathleen was no different. After her first child was born, the "love bond" shifted, Peterson became verbally abusive telling her she was "dog ugly" or fat after the birth of her son. She tried to please him and return to the place where the fire began in the relationship when they were dating. It was too late, Peterson had already worked at the core of her soul, over time isolating her from family and friends until she had no support system left. When his words were not enough to break her, he used his fists to drive his point home. Within two years another child was born to the marriage. But another child in the marriage only added to the madness.
Being married to a psychopath with a badge and gun was no different than living in a house without a door to exist. Drew Peterson had carefully set the stage not just with Kathleen, but those with whom he worked.
Part 3 of this series continues Saturday, September 11, 2010
[Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visit http://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/ She is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talk http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr. Laurie Roth http://www.therothshow.com/) ]
[Susan Murphy Milano is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is an expert on intimate partner violence and homicide crimes. For more information visit http://www.saferelationshipsmagazine.com/ She is the author of "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships," available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and wherever books are sold. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" on Here Women Talk http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated The Roth Show with Dr. Laurie Roth http://www.therothshow.com/) ]
1 comment:
Yes psychopaths are mostly a natural when it comes to being able to increase her sensation of bonding and attachment (even though he doesn't bond). The fast paced relationships, the breathing each other's air 24/7, the quick race to the altar or living together, are all normal parts of pathological love relationships. In fact, it's a RED FLAG. But beyond just that psychopaths do that, our research found out that the women are also 'prone' to similar behaviors due to her hard wiring of her own temperament (Women Who Love Psychopaths, 2nd Ed) discusses this in detail. Research is helping us to be able to identify the personality-type most likely to be in a relationship with someone this disordered. The ability to offer prevention to women who could end up with psychopaths is huge!
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