Friday, April 24, 2009

"Mommy, Please Wake Up"

He had a pattern of violence, including six arrests for disorderly conduct and three for battery. Five of the incidents were domestic disturbances. He was arrested for disorderly conduct and domestic violence and the bastard had serious bipolar and depression problems. He was dangerous.

Erica Ostenson, 24-years old single mother of 5 year-old Damon briefly dated this violent man whom I am not naming in this post.

Eric told “him” the relationship was over. He was angry and violent and Erica knew it was not healthy and more importantly safe for either she or her son, Damon. “If you don’t give me another chance at us, I’m going to do something you will regret.” Erica responded by telling “him” it’s best if they move on. She had already starting dating someone knew. “He” blew up and stated making serious threats against the lives of her son, the new relationship and her. “My life does not work unless you are with me. Accept my marriage proposal, you’ll see, things will be great.”
“No, Erica, said. It’s over, please leave.” He continued to text Erica “one more chance, please me” said one text message. Another text message read “don’t do anything you are gonna regret.”

He circled the area where Erica lived with Damon. “He” would get out of his car go up to the front door and demand to be let in to her home to talk.

Wednesday morning Damon didn’t have school. He was on the couch watching his favorite cartoon. There was a loud knock at the door.

“He” entered the home, Erica screamed for him to leave. “He” pulled out a gun, with Damon in the corner of the living room watching. “He” fired his weapon emptying it into Erica’s body and fled the scene into his car and drove away. Leaving behind a 5 year -old child to sit in the blood soaked carpet trying to wake up Mommy.”

It is important to document every text message, phone call , stalking incident and make a police police. In this town where Erica lost her life, police could have done more to intervene. They could have had training on domestic violence in this town of 59,729 residents. It is not the reason Erica lost her life. But, it is factor for many women like Erica who do not know their options for pressing new charges or insisting police make a report on every single incident.

There are so many of these tragedies, it no longer matter's where they lived or the name of the person who stole their lives. What is important is that we stop acting as though this crisis doesn't exist. Reaching a level I had hoped, I would never witness in my own lifetime.

Information and importanr safety strategies for anyone involved in an abusive or stalking relationship have been created to save lives. Sadly, created because women such as my mother were murdered because their cries for help fell on deaf ears.

Go to the library or visit my site and get a copy of my books, "Moving Out, Moving On" and "Defending Our Lives, getting away from domestic violence & staying safe. Turn up the volume on your computer and listen to this weeks radio show on Religion and domestic violence. Share this important resource with others in your community. You will save lives. This information can be used to relationships including women married to abusive police officer or person's in the military.


Safety Zone, Inc. said...

Th boy is very lucky to be alive. God protected him and his mother is now in heaven.

I hope those whp come to your blog and listen to your radio shows and read your books understand the information and services you provide are saving lives. I have yet to witness anyone out in the world as productive as you.

God bless you, Susan and your wondeful work!

Sara Huizenga Lubbers said...

This is so sad...may God especially wrap His arms around that poor baby forced to witness such sick cruely and senseless violent hate.

If you are in an abusive relationship or are aware of someone who is, please listen to Susan's show, visit her website and purchase her book, it truly, w/o a doubt will make a lifesaving difference if you do so.

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