Her body stuffed in a 55 gallon drum, encased in cement, discovered by law enforcement, hours ago in the New Jersey basement of the marital home, the remains of Randy "Amanda" Lehrer, age 32.
What is it going to take to stop the bloodshed? Mother's wanting out of their violent relationships, instead, filling up cemeteries across the county.
One significant change that must be implemented:
When a mother suddenly vanishes for the mental health of the surviving children; residential care must go to another relative. Randy's daughter was in danger. Anything could have happened while in the "care" of this individual. Care being the operative word since the child is too young to speak.
This is not about the law. This is not about guilt or innocence. It goes to the mental health and welfare of the minor children. In my opinion, the children are not in a healthy environment when left in the care of a potential "person of interest" or suspect.
Take the recent case of Susan Cox (Powell) her father-in-law just arrest on a multiple of charges that include child porn. Is that a healthy environment for the kids? No it was not.
In many of the intimate partner missing person suspected homicides the children are often in "the know" (if they can speak) as to what happened to their mother. Out of fear, the children are often silenced. Or they hear while in another room in the home enough to know "mommy is gone." Because of the unspoken fear, they remain quiet. A clever offender knows keeping the kids close they cannot be questioned by law enforcement.
Why not just do an automatic move of the kids when a report surfaces to a relatives home? With the understanding, the children cannot be questioned.
There are too many cases of intimate partner homicides, case after case where the surviving children suffer the most. I, as a homicide survivor of inmate partner related murder would like to see the State of New Jersey stand up and adopt policies within the current Statues to change not only how these I.P.V. cases are investigated, but, make allowances for the surviving children to thrive minus the fear of remaining in a mine field.
The husband was arrested and charged with Randy's homicide a few hours ago.
Randy Amanda Lehrer's life must have more importance to the State of New Jersey then another intimate partner homicide. When her daughter is old enough to speak, we have to be ready to do more then respond with a shrug of a shoulder while kicking the dirt on the ground.
The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit included in the book "Time's Up" is a Solution
An “Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" and video has the additional psychological benefit of being forced to face reality and admit that the potential for the ultimate kind of violence exists…and that if it occurs the perpetrator will be held accountable.
The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit: A Victim’s Voice (c)(TM)(R)
Domestic violence or intimate partner victims now are able to provide information, in their own words, about the fears, dangers, experiences they have had at the hands of their abuser. The" Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit" or "EAA" records victim's stories, histories, and experiences which are preserved and stored on their behalf. These videos will provide answers to the many questions, allegations, and fears that arise when a person has disappeared, gone missing, or been found dead.
In relationships it is important to equip one's self with the proper tools before announcing "it is over." That, is what cost Bea Dickey her life. Unfortunately, hers life mirrors thousand of others across the county, victims of intimate partner violence, trying to break away from their abusive relationships with their lives in tact.
If Beatrice Dickey, or any woman found murdered or is reported missing, had done an Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit, ON TAPE, from following the information in the “Time’s Up" book ,they would be able to describe:
- threats made against her life or wellbeing, including details of how the perpetrator would carry out the threat
- incidents of past abuse that the victim has endured
- admissions or comments made to her about other victims or people abused
- where evidence or weapons would or could be located
- possible alibis that the perpetrator would make up in his defense (including identification of people who could be co-defendant’s or co-suspects)
- portray visible injuries or marks
Just think if we incorporate the only effective plan in the country and have it available for every prosecutor, law enforcement, church, family law office and social service agency across the country, lives would be saved.
Through our corporate and security technology partners we bring the proprietary training to you and your company. And you can now be trained and certified to provide the "EAA" for your clients or within your law enforcement and legal communities or private company. If you are in law enforcement, private investigations, a lawyer practicing in family related matters including custody, a social worker, medical care provider, human resource or are with an employee assistance program or a direct insurer such as Blue Cross and Blue Shield, Zurich N.A., AIG, Anthem, Liberty Mutual, State Farm, AllState or Travelers.
Below is the video example of what someone does as they prepare:
If you are in a relationship that has a history of violence, simply mustering up the courage to confront the person and say it is over, without the proper tools, can cost you, your life!
Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up"fromCourage Network on Vimeo.
Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence cases and prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team atManagement Resources Limited of New York.
Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host ofThe Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire