Abusive Parents Who Sabotage the Medical Care of Their Children: The Susan Murphy-Milano Show Thursday April 5, 2012

A mother caught up by a psychopathic former husband in a court battle involving life and death issues with their son Clayton, who was born with nephrology issues that led to his first kidney transplant as a toddler. Mother and father divorced many several years ago.

The court at trial granted the mother custody of Clayton due to the father’s acts of domestic violence (against other women as well – he also was charged with witness tampering for his threats against those involved in his criminal matter).

Ever since the modification, things have been terrible. The father does not follow instructions of the doctors, preferring to get his medical information from the internet. At one point he gave the child a pill that he purchased off the internet that was guaranteed to cure all kidney disease. Clayton’s transplanted kidney failed and was removed several months ago meaning that he survives off of hemo-dialysis. He travels to Seattle three times a week for this. Mother works night shift at a local hospital and must leave work to get the child to his appointments. Father does everything he can to prevent this – making sure the child is not available to leave for appointments or messing with the transport arrangements, causing him to be late. The is currently in the Court of Appeals The child now has the option of having peritoneal dialysis which would allow him to be treated at home rather than constantly being at the hospital. The father is objecting because if this were to occur, the mother might actually get some sleep. As it is, she barely sleeps between the conclusion of dialysis and returning to work at night. The father argues over every bit of medication that the child is given. He constantly insists that the mother is not following doctor’s orders – although he could not tell you what is ordered. His skills are in throwing rocks that make the mother’s job as a parent as difficult as possible. He has no awareness whatsoever, and would deny, that his antics have genuinely hurt this child.

Guests: Sandra L. Brown, M.A. and Diana Sushak

The message that abusive parents will deliberately sabotage their child’s medical well-being if it hurts the other parent.

Join us with guest, Sandra L. Brown, M.A., Founder and CEO of

The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education, and Diana Sushak.

To LISTEN LIVE:  WWW.HEREWOMENTALK.COM

2-3:00 PM Eastern Time

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Crisis in Family Court: A Mother's Mission and Lifting the Silence

Duncan                                    Jack  

Back in September of 2009, just 5 months after Amy Leichtenberg's 2 boys Jack 7 years old and Duncan  9 years old were savagely murdered by their father during a court forced visitation, Amy gave an hour long interview.  During the show Amy discussed the steps taken to protect her children. Although her boys are gone, Amy's voice is not, she is shouting to stop the bloodshed of innocent lives.

The last time Amy saw her two boys alive, something was not right. Her estranged husband was acting out-of-sorts when they met at the police station. Amy refused to hand over her boys on March 7, 2009 an officer threatened her if she didn't give them to their father, she would be arrested according to her lawyer.

In 2007, Amy was awarded full custody of the boys with Connolly given supervised visitation. According to court reports from the family visitation center, Connolly's behavior was dangerous enough to temporarily cease all visits with the boys. In my experience, when a family visitation center terminates interaction between parent and child, it sends a red flag of danger. Connolly, the ever witty and clever abuser, was able to resume visits when his psychiatrist sent a "sympathy letter" to the judge "if my client is able to spend more time with his sons, Mr. Connolly's depression and outbursts would lessen."

The judge responded by setting a series of "behavioral guidelines." This included obtaining employment, housing and continued therapy.

In family court the two parties are presumed to be on a level playing field--law abiding individuals who have a disagreement over a private family matter. A core assumption of family law is that family disputes are not criminal disputes. As such, there are few safeguards built into the family court system to protect against the criminal dynamics that dominate family disputes in cases of family violence. In addition, the accusations the victim makes in family court, no matter how serious, carry no more authority than one person's say so. One of the most serious consequences is that when a family violence victim opens a case in family court against her abuser, the abuser is given equal opportunity to fight back against the victim's accusations, often because the abusers past is not an issue. Unless, of course, he is brought in from county or state prison sporting an orange jump suit and leg shackles.

There are lawyers and men’s groups who argue using domestic violence with a broad brush is not a reason to deny fathersvisitation with their children. Accusing mothers of lying or making up stories to keep fathers’ from their children.

Under the current laws, a parent without custody is entitled "reasonable visitation." There is a high burden of proof as evidenced in this case when a court refuses to take into account dangerous abusers pose to their children.

Until we place the issue of labeling these cases as a "private matter" or an isolated incident, expect the death toll among children to rise. And rise it has, with the recent murders of Charles 7 years of age and Braden 5 years of age on Sunday in the State of Washington.  Their father Josh Powell was the only person of interest since the boys mother Susan Cox vanished from the marital Utah residence on December 6, 2009.  Last week a judge ordered permanent placement of  Susan's children too her parents Chuck and Judy Cox.  However, as if this were a contestant game show Josh was given supervised visitation.  Josh Powell took an ax to each of his own children, doused gallons of gasoline in the home before lighting a match and blowing up the home.

If you are a judge, prosecutor, victim, mental heath provider, download the interview below and listen to Amy Leichtenberg.  Amy speaks for thousands of  other mothers across the country who are living the same fears.  If the abuser does not get their way from the victim and or the family courts, the children will die.  In many cases, they are all dying. Both men and women are murdering entire families before turning the gun on themselves and committing suicide.

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Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

 A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writes providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime

 http://documenttheabuse.com/