Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Cassie Leigh Cotta: "Hey We Need to Pay Attention- Our Women Are Dying!"

Cassie Leigh, 24 of Fort Smith, Arkansas was reported missing on December 30, 2011.  In this case her husband actually participated on searches for her, something rare in missing person intimate partner homicides.

On Cassie's Facebook page her husband left the message below the day before she vanished. And the couple had a history of domestic violence assaults.

Hey call me please

On her about me Facebook Cassie says "I'm independent, outspoken, in your face brutally honest"

This young woman who was a vibrant live fireball brought a community of strangers together for the goal of finding her. Most did not know her personally. They responded to a public call for help by her family.

To me, one look at her Facebook page and numerous comments says from the wings of angels Cassie Leigh was directing the shots somehow, if possible for her own search.

Hours ago, the husband took police to where he dumped her body. He has been charged with first degree murder of his wife.

Cassie was not about to take anymore shit. The guy she married had a control and rage issue that began in her eyes with harmless verbal threats to physical assaults. She like so many other young women, just like her, refused to believe his actions and threats would end Cassie's Life.

Maybe Cassie's family will consider creating a public campaign using her amazing tattoo artwork on posters with information about awareness on domestic and stalking to tattoo and body piercing parlors. Something like: "Yea I'm Tough. But I know When I'm Hit The 1st Time By a Boyfriend or Husband, It's Time To Walk Away.

Cassie Leigh's Favorite Listed Quote: "As we grow old, we learn that even the one person who wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You will have your heart broken more than once, and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts, too, so remember what it felt like when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for the things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and eventually, you'll lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt, because every sixty seconds you spend being upset is one minute that you'll never get back."

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.
 A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writesproviding commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime


Anonymous said...

Another tragedy.. just shameful... RIP Cassie Leigh Cotta. When will this end?
Susan, you are a real warrior bringing the country the information is needs to save so many lives. If only these victims would NOT ASSUME it would not be them. Everyone needs to read this website and learn what REALLY can happen.

Anonymous said...

This sweet girl is from my town. I know her family. RIP Cassie. <3

Anonymous said...

R.I.p cassie cotta ..ull be truely missed by a lot of peeps .. I was just thinking how we had a great time in high school .. u was very funny n blunt .. hell when people fought u was always there watching em n we would sit back n laugh .. those was the good o days .. I wish this could always go away .. n I wish that the neighbors would of called fort smith police n reported the fight.. maybe they would of gotten there for ur life n locked his ass up n u wouldnt have to deal with the abbuse .. I love u gurl ..

Anonymous said...

How many times do we have to mourn young women and young men. We never expect to be the one on the poster. I have lost friends and been what I thought at the time in Cassies position. We can mourn her but we really must remember there are still women and men out their in her place. We don't want to be there we want out. But who will be patient and wait and encourage us to be strong enough to leave. Leaving is a process that is harder than staying. I didn't know Cassie and my heart goes out to her family and friends. As much as we want to know if there was something that could have been done, remember that the only thing we can do is to help someone else. It is not fair that we give these abusers power. It is time to take back the power and think of our safety before we think of what could happen to the person who abuses the victim. May God Bless Cassie's friends and family with the courage to make a difference and not let her death be another win for domestic abusers.

Anonymous said...

I have known (knew, wow that's hard to say) Cassie for several years. I was a fellow bartender and had the priveledge of working with her and knowing her on a personal level. As a friend of hers, I know I am not the only one that feels that we failed her. I watched that relationship form from the very beginning. I watched it flourish and then I watched the abuse and did nothing. We can all sit here and be angry at Brent, but I am angry at myself for not doing more. For not stopping her from going back, for not encouring her to stay away. I know that Cassie was an amazing girl, and I will always be influenced by her carefree in your face way of life. I love you Cassie!!!! and I give you my word, I will do my best to not fail a friend again if I ever have one in the same situation!!!!!

Unknown said...

RIP. Cassie I lost my sister same way, too possessive husband, a bastard that disrespected my sister and even infected her with HIV because he wasn't sincere with their relationship yet went mad seeing her talking to any man. On several occassiions she threatened to leave he pulled a gun and even forced his friends on her because he wanted a threesome

Unknown said...

RIP cassie, I know how this feels my sister practically died in my arms from such violence. It's well with ur soul girl, u both died for the beautiful thing that failed u.

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